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"Murphy was an optimist!"

I Didn’t Get The Gay Marriage Ban Until Now November 14, 2006 7:09 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Humor, Touchy Subjects
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I voted against the constitutional amendment to declare marriage between a man and a woman. Now that I have read the Top 10 Reasons Gay Marriage Should Be Illegal I understand so much better.

09) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children. [Source]

Update: Critz and my wife both agree that I was a might unclear in this post. I realize that posting only one of the 10 reasons doesn’t convey the author’s sarcasm as well. Here are a couple more (number two is my favorite):

01) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

02) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

05) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of marriages like Britney Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

07) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

StopGeek has updated their post to point to the original source which was 12 reasons:

I was emailed the source by a reader which you can find here. Its similar, but not the same version i got in my email. [Source, StopGeek]

Comments after advertisement


1. Critter - November 14, 2006

I was raised solely by my mother. I /never/ met my real father. I consider myself successful.

2. djuggler - November 14, 2006

I listed that one simply as a sample of the sharp sarcasm that is in the whole top 10. The guy that wrote the list did exactly the right stuff to get blasted to the top of the charts on all the social sites with the misleading title on a very contraversial subject then writing each of the ten points beginning as if they were serious reasons to make gay marriage illegal only to turn it around in the end with sneering sarcasm. I’m sure many of his readers just didn’t get it. His comments degrade into flaming hate.

I almost didn’t post this one for fear that the skimmers would misinterpret this as me supporting a gay marriage ban.

3. Critter - November 14, 2006

ah well… that’ll teach me to skim, aye?