Oh yeah! Bong bong dang de dang diggy diggy!
Day: August 17, 2007
When the skeltons fall out of the closet
I have often pondered whether or not my life is in order enough for me to die. If Cathy and I got killed in a car accident today, would I be ashamed to have relatives, friends, and estate movers go through my house. The truth of the matter is there are 2 or 3 things that I should probably give some attention to before I die. One, having pack ratted and kept unnecessary clutter, I should get fly and throw out a bunch of stuff or at least clean and organize.
Oh my God! How did they live this way?!
Truthfully, Cathy and I are both working at de-cluttering. A slightly larger house or a couple of room additions to this one would be helpful. So would a storage shed for bikes, outdoor toys and yard equipment.
Two, I have kept journals, deep dark inner thoughts released to paper to unclutter the mind. These thoughts, some irrational and most situational, simply would not make sense to readers other than myself. I would hate to have someone’s memories of me misconstrued by some misinterpreted readings.
The boy needed therapy!
Note to self: find a trusted friend that will sneak in and burn those things after my demise.
Three, The Drawer of Sex and Violence. Admit it! If you are an adult, you’ve got one too. Shoot. If you are a teenager you probably have one. Granted, it may only contain condoms (or small condoms), a playboy (after all, you’ll go blind!), a flashlight, or something else that helps you ring your bell.
In late summer several years ago, the county medical examiner was called by the police to view two bodies found in bed in a private home. The home belonged to a 39-year-old caucasian male whose body was one of those found in the bed. The other body was that of a 31-year-old caucasian female. The female body overlaid that of the male. It was obvious that the couple was engaged in sexual relations when they died. [Source]
I do not mind admitting that I have worked through a few pages of The Sutra. By after reading this, I now understand what people mean by kinky.
The deaths apparently were related to the use of an elaborate apparatus utilizing electrical current for stimulation. [Source]
Those poor people! But I guess if you are going to go out…well…no…that’s just not one of the ways I want my body to be discovered.
Dear Sarah
I know you are a flighty teenager with boys on your mind and you know everything. Yes, parents are stupid. It is a miracle that we were able to figure out how to put tab A into slot B and produce a child whose intelligence far exceeds our own. I understand that we, as parents, somehow managed to live a very sheltered life and that in your mere 14 years you have accumulated far more life experiences and wisdom than we could ever hope for ourselves. Of course, we also went straight from our own mothers’ birth canals to adulthood so we in no way can relate to your teenage predilections (look it up). Now, I know it is a condition of our own ignorance that we lay such importance on silly, mundane things like putting clothes in the laundry instead of leaving them on the floor. Being organized helps our simple minds which is why we ride you so to live a clutter free and structured life. Do it for us! I can overlook the laziness of the clothing; however, please be sure to unplug your hair straightener. Being a dumb adult, I might grab the wrong end and burn myself. More importantly, being a toddler, with a decade left before he knows everything, Evan might burn himself. Oh, and since you already know everything and one day will be living on your own, certainly you can appreciate the fire hazard this tool presents. Wuv ya!
Procrastinate and Pay
I knew the forecast. Odds were rain would come last night and I still had the driveway covered with stuff from the garage. Mother Nature had been kind to me and gave sunshine so I could get caught up on work. Throughout the day I would go to the driveway and pull in an item or two. I should have taken 20 minutes and gotten it all in. Last night, Mother Nature watered the remaining stuff. Doesn’t look like anything is damaged terribly. Will let the sun dry things today and throw away anything that took significant damage.
