I am somewhat astounded by the frequency, as an adult, with which I forget to breathe.
I get it. I know I’m talking to a bot. But sometimes, I just have to reply.
Honest liana to me
Ohh My GOD You are a very handsome looking man and it’s hard for me to believe why such a handsome looking man like you be alone over there without getting ladies chasing on you.I just join Amateurmach today and read you profile and found it very interested, Well am really impressed by your profile and I would wish to get to know more about you to see where this will lead us in the future i am not here for games nor drama either would really like to find someone who is looking for something real on here there is no harm in trying would let’s take chance and see where these could lead us into.
Me to Honest liana:
I am so glad you found me! You are young and look like you would have good eggs. I am fascinated with the Duggar family and am hoping to find someone who wants to make 18 or 20 babies of her own. We can even have our own reality tv show from the very beginning!
Honest liana to me
Hello good morning how are u doing.. are u on Google a hangout for us to chat?
Me to Honest liana:
I think chatting is good. I will look into Google a hangout. I am excited that you want so many babies. I think we should live stream it all! We can video document all the babies’ conceptions and charge people to watch. Then we can live stream, like on Facebook live, the births and document every moment of their lives on blogs and snapchat. Just imagine how cool it will be with the world watching as that first baby pushes its head out of your vagina into the world. We can make a montage video with all 18 babies emerging at once! This will be so cool.
Honest liana to me
I sent u an invite on google hangout come acceptme
Aaand that’s where I hit the spam button.
Lucinda Elley to me:
I Am Ayisahtu osman i am single i have no kids i am here for a man to spend the rest of my life with if you are interested Kindly messaged me On hangouts
Me to Lucinda Elley:
Let me check with the wife tonight and see how she feels about this.
Evan, ruefully, to his sister Amy: "You get to walk to the mall from school. I get to eat ice cream on the track."
Our Delta kitchen faucet has been dripping for weeks..er, months. Each drip is the resounding echo of money going down the drain. It is also environmentally irresponsible. Our fix was to put a sponge under the drip so the sink would quit imitating a bass drum. I dreaded replacing the washers but finally decided to do it only to find that mineralization had frozen the screw which holds the hand to the faucet so tightly that I thought I’d break the handle getting it off. I soaked it in vinegar for days and, eventually, it broke free. That’s when I discovered you cannot replace the washers. Delta uses a cartridge which you can from Amazon for $20 or HomeDepot for $25ish. When I went to HomeDepot, the kind salesperson suggested that I contact Delta because they warranty these things. Sure enough, I called Delta today and in under 3 minutes a free replacement cartridge is on its way. In 7-10 days, our drip will be repaired. I cannot believe I put this repair off so long!
I’ve jumped the shark.
Me: “Do we have an Xbox one?”
Noah, 20 years old, flatly: “No.”
Ever been sitting around and suddenly think, “Man, I need a drill press!”?
What a beautiful day to work in the yard or replace a garage door! Instead, the headphones are on, music playing, incense burning, and keys rapping. I have a programming project that shall be put to bed today!
I bought my house in 1997. Today, I learn where the property lines are. I suspect both myself and the neighbors are in for a surprise.
I have fought serious depression since college…maybe earlier. Let’s call it 27 or 30 years of being chained to my black dog. But I cannot find him. Not that I’m actively looking. As I posted a few days ago, I feel very much on top of my game, on top of the world! Everything seems to be clicking now. The gears are meshing just right. The puzzle pieces are coming together. Everything is working. The children are doing well in their lives. Of all the goals I’ve set for myself (e.g. cleaning up the mess caused by running my own business, fixing the problems with the IRS, making progress on the house, etc.) are being achieved. Only one major one (a health issue but that’s a different story altogether) hangs over my head but I even see that being resolved soon. I am responding well to obstacles and the unexpected. I am performing better at my job and for my freelance customers. I feel more organized and alive than I have in years.
I don’t know if that black dog lurks in the shadows. I see no evidence of him. My old friends will recall my "guardian angel," Murph, named after Murphy of the Law. Murph hasn’t been present in eons. Maybe the black dog has gone off with Murph. Now, yin and yang still exist. The universe wants to be in balance. So, things happen to try to rock my boat. As I become happier and more content in my life, the universe occasionally tries to right that by chopping at my ankles. I received a surprise today that left me baffled, shocked, and temporarily sad…but not depressed. For a moment, I was knocked off-balance but I recovered quickly. People have their reasons and motivations and it is not for me to judge. I need only remind myself how I feel now feels really nice and that I do not want to go back to walking my black dog.
My goal is to awaken every morning at 4:30am. I am getting closer to achieving that goal. Today I awoke at 4:22am. Wide awake! Even rose from bed and moved about. BUT, the fatal flaw, I returned to the bed for "just a few minutes." I left the bed to begin my day at 6:30am. Two hours of potenial productivity slept away.
I feel on top of the world. I’m at the top of my personal and professional game. I’m happy. I’ve been happy for some time now.
This weekend, I witnessed a lady in a hot pink, short skirt wearing 4.5″ heels walking out of Home Depot. I can only assume she was shopping for some pipe.
Old water heater is out of the house.
Ok, add whole house water filter to the shopping list…