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"Murphy was an optimist!"

From the mouths of babes December 10, 2016 6:52 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad, Pets
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Me: "Goddammit, quit stepping on the cats!"
(Probably not the most constructive statement in the moment)

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Yes, I used a spreadsheet December 2, 2016 8:46 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Cathy, Daily Life, Of Being Dad, Sex, Touchy Subjects
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After 16 years, I have finally figured out when I can and cannot ask my wife for a special dates. Data is beautiful!

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From the mouths of babes November 21, 2016 12:17 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
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Is your pet a healthy weight?

Context: Evan, our 11 year old, helped me drop one of the cats off at the veterinarian for a comprehensive exam last Wednesday. Behind the scale is this sign. Recently, both our 12 year old and 9 year old German Shepherds died.

Evan, 11 years old, studies the sign: "Dad, I think our next dog should be a three, four, or five."
Me: "Evan, that’s not a menu."

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From the mouths of babes November 5, 2016 9:49 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
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Me: "Alexa, play the Ramones."
Alexa: *jams*
Groggy 11 year old Evan walks into the room: "Dad, could you turn down the music?"
Me: "What are you guys doing?"
Evan: "Sleeping…"

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What do you want to be when you grow up? August 20, 2016 7:17 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Family, Of Being Dad, Pets
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I’m pretty sure as a child I wanted to be an architect (thank you Dad and Michael Brady), and maybe an astronaut, and definitely an entertainer; but NEVER do I recall saying, “Hey, I’d like to spend the better part of my adult life cleaning up pee and poo and other bodily fluids.”

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From the mouths of babes August 14, 2016 10:30 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad, Tommy
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My eldest son: "Dad, the mower won’t start."

Me: "I’ll take a look at it."

Cranks on first pull. I report back to my son, "Started on the first try."

My son with holier-than-thou indignity with a touch of anger and a dash of annoyance, "Well I’d sure like to know what you are doing different than me because I pulled that string for 10 minutes and it didn’t start."

Me: "I put gas in it."

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We all grow weary June 19, 2016 7:19 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Of Being Dad, Philosophy, Poetry
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The daily grind. People say such flippantly. But it wears on us. Grind. Dulling the edge. Like gears without oil. And our performance drops. Then our enthusiasm wanes. Leading to more stress. GRIND. Along comes motivation. Acceptance of the mistakes. A revitalization. But to escape the beatdown. You must work three times as hard. grind.

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I am so loved June 18, 2016 11:59 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Family, Of Being Dad
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I am so loved by my family! And I so do not deserve it. They love me unconditionally. I have been weak recently. I have responded to my children and wife in anger this week. Each time was completely unnecessary. Stress is no excuse. Most recently we had a fire in the house. Amy burned a note her brother wrote a time ago. It had some ugliness in it she decided no one else should see so she burned it in a trash can filling the house with smoke. I was calm as I sought out the smell of fire. She was afraid and denied it being a fire. I said, “that is a fire” to which she replied, “no it is not a fire.” I was flabbergasted and lost my temper. I brought tears instead of taking the opportunity to teach. The fire was controlled. We could have observed it. Discussed it. But alas, I yelled. Words and shouts in anger are no different than using hands for hitting. I regrouped and asked that we open all the windows. Two remained closed and when I asked Amy to open them she back talked and my anger resurfaced. Oh teenage girls…so difficult.

I was just treated to an early Father’s Day. My family is terrific! I am so undeserving of their love. I vow to be a better father to them. A better provider. And a kinder soul. To my family, I love you!

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From the mouths of babes June 12, 2016 9:21 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad, Tommy
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Tommy: "You were typing on my keyboard the other night weren’t you?"

Me: “Yes, I just wanted to try it out. I’m thinking about buying one.”

Tommy: “The guys in my forum got a good laugh out of that.”

Me: “Oh, your monitors were off but your computer was still on wasn’t it?”

Tommy: “Yup. You typed your initials and part of your name. Then ‘This would be a good keyboard for programming.’ and some random characters. I told them ‘Oh, that was just my dad playing on the keyboard.’ They got a good laugh out of it.”

  1. I’ve become THAT dad.
  2. it is time to change that password.
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The Guilty Provider May 30, 2016 11:25 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Family, Of Being Dad
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Today is beautifully sunny. Apparently the children have a dental appointment in 2 hours (on Memorial Day?!). I’m at the computer programming and feeling guilty that I’m not spending time with the children.

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Lawnmower repairs May 8, 2016 8:50 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, House, Of Being Dad
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This time the carburetor rebuild worked…damn.

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From the mouths of babes April 23, 2016 7:20 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
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Me: "Do you want steak for dinner?"
Boy child: "Do we have barbecue sauce?"
Me: "Ok, sirloin for you."

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Today begins a new chapter in my children’s lives April 9, 2016 11:08 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Evan, Family, Of Being Dad
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The state of TN is at war with public education. They are out to destroy public education and my youngest two children are on the front lines. We are testing our children to stupidity. The teachers have no time to provide a quality education because we are constantly prepping for the next test. I am pro-gadget, pro-electronic and want my children absorbed in this fascinating digital world with their easy access to all of humanity’s knowledge. However, my ten year old’s generation is suffering as the first generation to be raised from birth with screens in front of them. Their craving for information and multitasking is on par with a cocaine addict, alcoholic, or gambler.

I personally have fallen. I have failed to dedicate time to my children. Today changes that. Today we began meditation and reading aloud (Jonathan Livingston Seagull). Today we began to learn about First Things First with a discussion of the four quadrants and how to live in Quad II. Today is a good day and will be followed by so many more.

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From the mouths of babes March 31, 2016 9:10 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
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Me: "I love you Amy. You are awesome!"
Amy: "Thanks. It runs in the family."

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May the children and their children be so much better than me March 12, 2016 12:38 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Family, Of Being Dad
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At some point, I just need to accept that I’m a horrible person and hope that perhaps my children can rise above and not be anything like me.

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