Reality Me

All Bridges Closed!

Written by

Doug McCaughan

in

, , , ,

This just in!

KNOXVILLE (Rooters) The Department of Homeland Insecurity (DHI) has re-enacted the Local Militia Act of 1775 to close all bridges across the country. Head of DHI’s Transportation Division, Mr. Jack A Sinine, explains, "we have over extended our National Guard so calling upon local militia to barricade our bridges and protect the public’s safety is cost effective and a boon to the local economy. Instead of having starving farmers on their porches with shotguns they will sit in front of the bridges acting as transportation routes officials limiting logistical security. After collecting a toll which helps pay for their services, these TROLLS will steer people to the nearest airport preventing them from crossing the dangerous bridge and allowing us to take the traveler’s fingerprints, naked pictures with our x-ray scanners, and document their every move around the country for their own safety. They are still free to travel anywhere in the country as long as they do not cross a bridge. For their own safety!"[Source]

My wife should feel much better now!

Comments

4 responses to “All Bridges Closed!”

  1. b. arther Avatar
    b. arther

    Ah, a beautiful day to tell ya the truth, em, let me eat those first. em. well pritty terrified now. gotta go choke my chord. last time a missed you was in the sack, gosh. pretty picky these days with food on the tongue and mashed potatoes thrown at me. The last time i frogged a mister like maself was about 10. I remembered the fasting in me and grew fond of forgoing it. The next part was all to my self and i knew it would be, it was as a good boy would go and do, it was self pleasing and written in stone, but the more you know the more you are just passing the buck next to your whole sun in hand theory and i might just do you for if your knocked out. because i made you. i did not tell you about it but i made you. made you. made you

  2. b. arther Avatar
    b. arther

    Scads of me, dow

  3. b. arther Avatar
    b. arther

    fa loot joyce

  4. b. arther Avatar
    b. arther

    I punch then you take my hunch and then we all get along, tips from australia, and linder co. don’t mind if i do don’t assme if you want any dinner. don’t say that. don’t fight me. don’t bewittle me.
    i want a slicer dicer. i want a coma to logo. i want my shin in my face, i had that. i had you. i did it personal. i could adhere to the monotony but it would be good for me to shut F up. It wuld be good for the both of US> well sure if you put it tat way. I ganeed before. sure if you put it the other way. i deenag before with all that trash talk, it was as thought my JONES bouthg me pail. in the dark kitten stash. was it fluxing?

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