"Murphy was an optimist!"
Confessions of a programmer May 22, 2016 9:34 amPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Programming, Technology
Confessions of a programmer: I never presume the previous developer was incompetent. Instead, I assume they just had a drug problem. #coapadd a comment
Lawnmower repairs May 8, 2016 8:50 amPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, House, Of Being Dad
This time the carburetor rebuild worked…damn.add a comment
From the mouths of babes May 7, 2016 5:11 pmPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Cathy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes
Her: What do you want for dinner?
Him: *something* *something* *9 1/2 weeks* *inappropriate* *something*
Her: Help me!
Her, holding up iPhone: Somehow, I don’t know how, it recorded that.
Him, grabbing iPhone sees an audio message sent to…Granny.
Him bolts out front door to see Granny fidgeting with her phone.
Him opens door to car and grabs phone.
Granny: I’ve never received an audio message before.
Him: I think it recorded silence.
13 year old, giggling: I think Dad recorded something by accident.
Him: It was your mother and it had secrets. *delete*
Her: I deleted it but it just took a while.
Him: That deletes it off your phone, not hers!
Sunday night May 1, 2016 9:55 pmPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life
I’ve reached that point in the evening where I acknowledge I’m too tired to program but could muster and go a few more hours. Or I could relax with a book. Or television with the wife. Or guitar on the porch while the storm rolls in. Or meditate. Or fret. Or clean the kitchen. Or clean my desk downstairs. Or plan. Or or or or…sleep.add a comment
The future cometh April 30, 2016 9:56 amPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life
In 7 years my children will all have graduated high school.
In 11 years my children will all have graduated college.
In 12 years nobody will be able to find me.
From the mouths of babes April 23, 2016 7:20 pmPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
Me: "Do you want steak for dinner?"
Boy child: "Do we have barbecue sauce?"
Me: "Ok, sirloin for you."
Protected: Tax paperwork April 16, 2016 11:15 amPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life
Saturday in the middle of April April 16, 2016 9:16 amPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life
It is a beautiful weekend…which I will be spending on the computer. And tax paperwork. And slipping in some cleaning. And medicating the animals.
I would like to be shopping for a new car, working on the yard, working on the house, gardening, adventuring with the children, etc. Such is adulthood.add a comment
Today begins a new chapter in my children’s lives April 9, 2016 11:08 amPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Evan, Family, Of Being Dad
The state of TN is at war with public education. They are out to destroy public education and my youngest two children are on the front lines. We are testing our children to stupidity. The teachers have no time to provide a quality education because we are constantly prepping for the next test. I am pro-gadget, pro-electronic and want my children absorbed in this fascinating digital world with their easy access to all of humanity’s knowledge. However, my ten year old’s generation is suffering as the first generation to be raised from birth with screens in front of them. Their craving for information and multitasking is on par with a cocaine addict, alcoholic, or gambler.
I personally have fallen. I have failed to dedicate time to my children. Today changes that. Today we began meditation and reading aloud (Jonathan Livingston Seagull). Today we began to learn about First Things First with a discussion of the four quadrants and how to live in Quad II. Today is a good day and will be followed by so many more.add a comment
Virtual reality has arrived April 9, 2016 10:05 amPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Technology, Virtual Reality (VR)
Not nude but boobies: https://gfycat.com/FixedTightCobraadd a comment
Formula to create a fascist state April 4, 2016 6:46 amPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Politics, Touchy Subjects, United States
It occurred to me last night that my entire adult life has been an experiment to convert America to a fascist state. How do you that?
- Change the economic system such that the bulk of the populace has to work two or more jobs to make ends meet. This takes away their time for family, self-improvement, self-satisfaction, self-education, personal satisfaction, personal growth, and health. If all the adults in the household are too busy to interact with their children, they cannot further their children’s education and their children grow up disconnected and lacking human empathy.
- Dumb down the public education system by placing an emphasis on testing instead of knowledge.
- Pit the common people against each other. This is easy since they have been dumbed down and lack empathy.
- Create more laws to reinforce 1, 2, and 3. This becomes easy since the public is not educated enough to understand what is happening and they have become divided upon their differences in race, religion, and philosophy.
This is the experiment we living in America.
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From the mouths of babes March 31, 2016 9:10 pmPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
Me: "I love you Amy. You are awesome!"
Amy: "Thanks. It runs in the family."
From the mouths of babes March 23, 2016 9:56 pmPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes
Evan, 10 years old: "Dad, I need you to do me a favor?"
Evan: "My friends want you to draw one of those pictures on my lunch bag for the field trip tomorrow."
Our spaceship March 22, 2016 2:02 pmPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life
I imagine our ancestors’ conversations went something like this:
Scientist 1: “We should explore the universe.”
Engineer 1: “How? It’s so large it would like multiple hundreds of lifetimes.”
Engineer 2: “We’d need a space ship. That could hold a lot of water. I mean like 71% water.”
Scientist 1: “Ok. What about food?”
Engineer 1: “The space ship needs to hold lots of food. Generations of food. Means that we cannot package it. Has to be renewable. That means soil, fertilizer, a lot that water. Oh, and animals. The animals are a food source as well as fertilizer generators.”
Engineer 1: “Damn this is going to require a lot of energy.”
Engineer 2: “That’s easy. Fusion!”
Engineer 1: “That would have the side affect of killing all the people, animals, and plants and contaminating or evaporating all the water.”
Engineer 2: “Not if the Fusion happens off of the space ship.”
Engineer 1: “Off the space ship? That would have to be like 92.96 million miles OFF the space ship!”
Scientist 2: “This sounds great but wouldn’t astroids pose a treat to our space ship?”
Engineer 1 and 2 in unison: “We’d build shielding of course.”
Engineer 1: “Is the Jupiter project still being researched?”
Engineer 2: “It’s ready for production.”
Scientist 1: “Jupiter project?”
Engineer 2: “Basically you take hydrogen gas and package it in an oblong sphere that is approximately 88,846 miles in diameter and gravity will pull all the nearby astroids into the gas cloud obliterating the treat to our space ship.”
Scientist 1: “How do we move the space ship?”
Engineer 1: “We predetermine a course. You will get one relatively straight line so chose wisely. This ship is going to have so much mass that changing direction will be implausible. We will use the fusion energy source as the engine to move the spaceship along.”
Scientist 2: “The energy source that is 92 million miles from the space ship?”
Engineer 2: “92.96 million miles. Yes. That energy source is so massive that its gravity will pull the space ship and the shielding along with it. All we have to do is start with a large explosion, a big bang, to move the energy source along our predetermined path.”
Scientist 1: “Can we have two space ships?”
Engineer 1: “Sure! Tell you what. We can configure them slightly different. And call one Earth.”
Engineer 2: “And the other Mars! That way if one fails, our species continues to explore.”
Scientist 2: “Will the supplies last?
Engineer 1: “Just in case, let’s throw in 11 more supply ships. Each one can be responsible for a raw material that the primary two space ships may need for subsistence. Let’s call them Mercury. Venus. Jupiter. Saturn. Uranus. Neptune. Pluto, Hercules, Apollo, Zelus, and Priapus.”
Scientist 2: “Make it so number one.”
My head throbs March 13, 2016 8:36 amPosted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life
My head throbs because it is raining outside and I want to be putting down lye and grass seed. My head throbs because I want to go back to yesterday morning and do yesterday completely different. My head throbs because I need to be working on my client’s work but I want to be writing. My head throbs because I have not yet had coffee. My head throbs because I want to be cleaning my house and making repairs. My head throbs because I have dreams I cannot, will not ever fill. My head throbs because I want to be doing my taxes. My head throbs because I am thinking about anything except what I am doing.add a comment