Student: It’ll be bad. I don’t want to look.
Master: It’ll be worse if you don’t open your eyes.
Month: May 2008
Why Twitter Rocks!
Without Twitter, where else would you heard about "frog potion" and "skunkwork lab"?
Today would be a good day to pull my frog potion out of the skunkwork lab. It isn’t complete due to missing ingredients. [Source, Twitter, @selves]
The War of 2020 between China and the US
You did know we are at war with China, didn’t you?
Of Grasshoppers
Student: I talk too much.
Master: Shush!
Question for kia owners
What is "esc off"? I can make far too many geeky jokes about this button.
Mobile post sent by djuggler using Utterz.
Iron Man Non-spoiler Spoiler
I am now following @Bagadonuts because of this Tweet:
Re:"Iron Man"(2008)The script revealed Tony Stark(Iron Man) to be the creator of Dr. Otto Octavius’s tentacles from Spider-Man 2 (2004). [Source, Twitter,@Bagadonuts]
Which is a shame that it doesn’t appear in the film because it makes the robots in the garage exponentially cooler! (and more believable)
Other great ones from @Bagadonuts:
Re:"The Dark Knight"(2008) As a joke one bat suit was made with nipples and presented to Christian Bale as the new and improved costume. [Source, Twitter,@Bagadonuts]
Re:"Caddyshack"(1980)The noises the Gopher makes are vocalized by a dolphin, and those are the same ones used for “Flipper” series (1964). [Source, Twitter,@Bagadonuts]
Re:"The Patriot"(2000) One of the redcoats (actually dummies) floating face down in the river after the “trap” is a dummy of John Travolta. [Source, Twitter,@Bagadonuts]
Re:"Rain Man"(1988) During filmimg, both Hoffman and Cruise doubted the movie’s potential and jokingly called it, “Two Schmucks in a Car”. [Source, Twitter,@Bagadonuts]
My lawn mower punched me in the face
Update:
Of Grasshoppers
Student: I need a vice.
Master: You need a grip!
Discouraging pets with dollars
Take THAT you evil code!
Yes! I have been fighting a horrid coding problem and the code just lost! I beat it! I mean this is the type of problem that makes you have bald spots and want to give up programming for something less painful like digging latrines in third countries. This is like I’ve been trying to build a car engine but everything is in metric and all my tools are SAE and the client doesn’t care about the engine but really wants to know why the paint isn’t on the car yet. Oh how I want to be beyond the paint and putting the last bit of polish on the application. Today I should be able to make much progress. Oh wait, no I have to be at the body shop by 8am! Guess my workday will begin at 10am. How frustrating!
Can you resist the urge to type a url into your browser?
Can you watch this video and not type the url into the browser to see what comes up? No. I didn’t think you could resist. Me neither.
Note: If the words penis or fart causes your work censor alarms to go off, then this Saturday Night Live video may not be work safe but then again this post didn’t get through either. Thank you Victor Agreda for the link!
Bust’d
So I’m walking out of Walmart to the car and I see this woman approaching. I’m staring at her and staring at her and staring at her and staring at her when suddenly it occurs to me that her shirt has words on it. The words read, "KEEP STARING!" No, I don’t know what her face looked like.
Update: My wife actually asked, "were you really staring at that woman?" and I had to explain, "It’s difficult not to stare when something is covering up the entire horizon!"
Of Grasshoppers
Student: Hard day ahead.
Master: Good night ahead.
Of Grasshoppers
Student: It is hard to think a little alcohol wouldn’t make it all better.
Master: A little alcohol would make it hard to think better at all.
