There comes a time everyday in a man’s life where he has to stop and ask himself, "Have I done anything to aggrivate my wife today? Should I?" Mine came a few minutes ago as I snickered and revelled at how fun a little demolition would be today. I wised up quickly and decided that I should stay focused on the project at hand which happens to be some cleaning so that I can actually get to the project at hand. However, something had to be done with the stupid energy that was built-up in preparation to do some demolition. As we know, energy must conserved so when stupid energy is generated, stupid energy must be used. So, as I ask outloud, "What’s this switch do?" I quickly remember that most of my home computer network profoundly sits on a single circuit that is connected to a light switch beside the garage door. I guess the tape keeping the switch in the on position should have been a clue. Doh.
Category: Philosophy
Think deep.
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Holiday Music
Here are some titles over at Santastic. My disclaimer: I haven’t listened to any of these but I found the titles amusing.
- Rudolph the Paranoid Reindeer
- Stop I’ve Had Enough Christmas Music
- Let Me Clear My Throat At Christmas
- Rudolph Berry Molecular Pattern 5
- Horny Christmas (mature theme warning!)
Update: James gives these a thumbs down.
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Cathy gets eBay – really well!
So, Cathy has this collection of Rodney Reindeers from Hallmark. They have been discontinued. We had 6 but now there are seven people in the family. I offer to help her find one more but she wants to take care of it. Several days pass and I hear nothing about it so I decide to take some initiative and check eBay. Rodney has about 85 auctions. I exuberantly relay the information to Cathy who responds with, "shutup!"
Apparently Cathy discovered Rodney on eBay on her own. And lost her first auction. In an effort to not lose again, she bid on 6 auctions! She won 3 of them. So, if the number of Rodneys are supposed to match the number of people in house, Cathy had better get to work because it appears we need to more than double the size of the household.
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I Didn’t Get The Gay Marriage Ban Until Now
I voted against the constitutional amendment to declare marriage between a man and a woman. Now that I have read the Top 10 Reasons Gay Marriage Should Be Illegal I understand so much better.
09) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children. [Source]
Update: Critz and my wife both agree that I was a might unclear in this post. I realize that posting only one of the 10 reasons doesn’t convey the author’s sarcasm as well. Here are a couple more (number two is my favorite):
01) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
02) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
…
05) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of marriages like Britney Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
…
07) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
…StopGeek has updated their post to point to the original source which was 12 reasons:
I was emailed the source by a reader which you can find here. Its similar, but not the same version i got in my email. [Source, StopGeek]
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Of Grasshoppers
Student: What does it mean when you awaken and the clock reads 3:33?
Master: It is too early. Go back to sleep. -
“Office Space” Thriller
Anyone in the tech world has Office Space
as one of their favorite movies and Code Monkey as a favorite song (well, maybe not but I’m pimping it). It’s greeeeeat! Check out this recut.
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Living Quad I
Dear Stephen R Covey,
How does your system work when _everything_ is Urgent and Important?
Sincerely,
Testing Tensile Strength -
Of Grasshoppers
Student: What have I done to get here?
Master: You walked a path. Along the way you made choices. -
Of Grasshoppers
Student: Nothing is going right today.
Master: Pick one thing that cannot possibly go wrong and do it next. Repeat. -
Today’s Irony
Nearly one million bank workers in India are on strike…wait it for it…because they don’t want their jobs outsourced!
The unions are against outsourcing of bank work and a government proposal to merge 27 state-run banks to compete in the global economy. [Source]
This tidbit brought to us by Knoxviews and Michael Silence.
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Unfortunate Job Assignment
This looks real. {image source]
Apparently he is a local report in LA.
…thats marc brown he does the local news in HD here in LA. poor guy – he’s actually likeable… [Source]
