Do you remember sex education in middle and high school where they told us about all these horrific things our bodies were about to spring on us? Why didn’t they tell us about the things that matter‽ Like freakishly long nose hairs! Braidable nose hairs! And I’m not even old yet. The horrors! And man, if my wife only knew the things I’ve done with her eyebrow tweezers!
Blog
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Arrow to the Knee!
I’ve earned my knee socks. That’s right, I’ve been Scoutborged. With Noah working up the ranks in Boy Scouts and Evan having begun scouts as a Tiger scout, I find myself a leader in both Cubscouts and Boy Scouts and Cathy has earned her Scout Widow badge. In June, I will be going on an adventure with Noah to hike in the Canyons of Utah for 9 days (with no cell phone or Internet!) This past weekend, Amy, Evan and I toured and slept overnight in The Lost Sea Caverns. The Weekend before that, Evan and I hiked for miles around Camp Buck Toms, slept over night, and came home with ticks. The weekend prior to that I slipped while doing yard work and torqued my knee. And today, three weeks later, my knee is still tender, hurts to touch, and I cannot put much weight on it.
So, I just paid $25 to have my doctor tell me I’m out of shape. End of story. So to celebrate, I decided to go to Cookout and have a cheese burger with onions, french fries, and hush puppies..MMMMMMmmm. While waiting for my food, I look around the joint and every morose soul there is 2 to 3 times my overweight size. They don’t speak or smile. Slow Jesus rock emanates loudly from the store speakers. For a moment, I consider leaving the five dollars and change worth of heart disease on the counter to escape quickly. In weakness, I grab the food and Cheer Wine float, return to work, and joined a gym.
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From the mouths of babes
15 year old boy: "This Kool-aid kinda smells like vomit."
Me: "What did you say?"
Teen: "This Kool-aid smells like vomit."
Me: "Then why are you drinking it?"
Teen: "Because it tastes really good!"
Me: "I’m going to make you famous…" -
RIP Gray
Exactly how many animals can I bury in my yard before I have to get licensed as a pet cemetery?
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Of Grasshoppers
Student: My life has been one wake up call after another.
Master: When will you quit hitting snooze? -
From the mouths of babes
From the neighbor’s yard: "ba baw baw baw ba ba baaawwwk!" pause "ba baw baw baw ba ba baaawwwk!"
Me: "Son, do you know what that noise is?"
Clueless 15 year old: "Uh, some bird?"Obviously, I don’t get my children out enough.
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Connecticut Voting on Marijuana Legalization Today
Since they are voting on legalization on 4/20 is the outcome of the vote a bit predetermined?
Update 4/26/2012: Yup, it passed.
The House of Representatives voted late Wednesday night to legalize marijuana for medical purposes for adults — despite a letter from the state’s top federal prosecutor saying that those growing marijuana would be violating federal law.
The vote was 96-51 in favor.
Patients would be required to receive a prescription from a physician to receive marijuana to relieve pain from illnesses such as cancer, glaucoma, HIV and multiple sclerosis. The bill would allow some producers to cultivate and grow the marijuana, and licensed pharmacists could provide the marijuana to patients. Patients would need to requalify every year in order to keep smoking medical marijuana.
[Source, Hartford Connecticut Courant, House Approves Legalization Of Medical Marijuana]
