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"Murphy was an optimist!"

2nd Place: “Women Were Designed For Homemaking” April 13, 2009 9:03 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Religion / Spirituality, Science, Touchy Subjects
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Maybe the Creationists are onto something!

Jonathan Goode (grade 7) applied findings from many fields of science to support his conclusion that God designed women for homemaking: physics shows that women have a lower center of gravity than men, making them more suited to carrying groceries and laundry baskets; biology shows that women were designed to carry un-born babies in their wombs and to feed born babies milk, making them the natural choice for child rearing; social sciences show that the wages for women workers are lower than for normal workers, meaning that they are unable to work as well and thus earn equal pay; and exegetics shows that God created Eve as a companion for Adam, not as a co-worker. [Source, OBJECTIVE: Ministries, Fellowship Baptist Creation Science Fair 2001 Article by Dr. Richard Paley & FBCSF Staff]

Other winners:

Elementary School Level
1st Place: "My Uncle Is A Man Named Steve (Not A Monkey)"
2nd Place: "Pine Cones Are Complicated"
Middle School Level
1st Place: "Life Doesn’t Come From Non-Life"
2nd Place: "Women Were Designed For Homemaking"
High School Level
1st Place: "Using Prayer To Microevolve Latent Antibiotic Resistance In Bacteria"
2nd Place: "Maximal Packing Of Rodentia Kinds: A Feasibility Study"

The Creation Science Fair honorable mentions are equally as great with my favorite being a tie between "Pokemon Prove Evolutionism Is False" and "Thermodynamics Of Hell Fire."

Comments after advertisement


1. Michael Silence - April 13, 2009

Can I have the menus you’ve collected over the years?

2. Doug McCaughan - April 13, 2009

Unfortunately I’ve committed them to memory and discarded the actual menu. It seems I’ll be taking those to the grave.

3. Morgan - April 13, 2009

OMG these are so funny. More and more I think I am going to look into going back to school to be a science teacher.

4. Doug McCaughan - April 13, 2009

You’d be an awesome science teacher!

5. Dylan Wolf - April 13, 2009

You had me until the “Other Winners” section, which just proves Poe’s Law is true.

6. LissaKay - April 13, 2009

Science does far more to prove the existence of God than anyone, anywhere has been able to disprove by any means or method (See Lee Strobel: The Case for Christ|God|Faith). It takes a great deal of blind faith to be an atheist. I just don’t have that much faith, that’s why I’m a follower of Christ. Life is much easier and less complicated that way. Then, of course, if I’m wrong, no big loss to me. But if the Christ-deniers are wrong … whoo boy! Bad news! (For them!)

Re: the title – indeed, women tend to be better suited to being the keepers of hearth and home. Men tend to be better suited to providing said hearth and home. Nothing wrong with that at all. It will only be if and when we are all able to appreciate, respect and honor not only the other gender’s strengths, abilities and tendencies but our own as well, will we finally be able to put an end to this retarded “War of the sexes” and the “politically correct” speech limitations and be able to really love and honor each other.

7. Doug McCaughan - April 13, 2009


8. Doug McCaughan - April 13, 2009

Spoof or real?

Yahoo Answers claims the site http://objectiveministries.org/kidz/ is a spoof (S+1) indicating that http://objectiveministries.org/ itself would be a parody site (S+1) but despite claiming that the reproduction of a Ken Ham (S+1) document is evidence of the parody, I don’t think the Yahoo answerer offers enough evidence. (R+1) – Spoof 3 points, Real 1 point

The folks at Good Reason Blog were steering toward REAL (R+1) but a commenter was quick to link to FAIL (S+1) but that fail link is dead (S-2) so their leaning toward REAL (R+1) gets more points. – Spoof -1, Real 1

Museum of Hoaxes goes for satire (S+1) but only on a gut feeling (S-1) offering no evidence that the Creationist Science Fair didn’t exist.(R+1) – Spoof 0, Real 1

Democratic Underground goes to parody. (S+1) – Spoof 1 point, Real 0

Spoof gets 4 points
Real gets 3 points

Spoof wins! Whew that was close!

9. Danny - April 13, 2009

I think it’s a hoax. It has the look & feel of Landover Baptist, and purports to be against Landover.

Plus, their resident anti-sex guy is nicknamed “skeet”, which is slang for… well, look it up.