I’m exhausted. I spent the latter part of the afternoon with Sarah in the doctor’s office. She is so strung out that she has a nasty fever blister and it looks like its spreading to her eye. Unfortunately tomorrow is school pictures. Why is this child so stressed? Does she have too many adult figures in her life she is trying to please? 2 Grandparents, 2 parents, and 1 biological father. Are we too critical of her? Is she asking for things and not getting them because we aren’t listening or think we are hearing one thing when she is actually saying another?
I wish I could describe the looks she gives. She has reached that mature age of 10 where she is certain that her parents are retarded (and I choose that word intentionally) and she has all the answers. Whatever you do, please don’t try to reason with her or contradict her even if she is wrong because you are going to catch Valley Girl attitude (that should have been with a capital A).
Got home expecting a battle with Tommy over his math homework so I approached it very calmly and sedately with book in hand so I could read while he screamed. I was determined to not let his noises and attempts to rile get to me; unfortunately, I forgot about everyone else. The tired baby started feeding off of him, the mother with migraine turned up the television to drown him out (noise and chaos bad for an aspie – new term for me learned recently), the brother in his normal oblivious cloud took no notice, and the sister that just wouldn’t hurry up and get to bed (I almost detected some competition for attention briefly) helped proliferate the chaos which ended with Tommy receiving a “get your act together” slap in the face. We avoid such treatment at all possible costs but Tommy had left reality and was starting to spiral out of control. He came back to reality albeit with many tears. He and I moved to a more controlled location in the basement and he screamed, cried, insulted, said hurtful things, masterbated, pretended to fall asleep, complained and did about everything he could think of to try to upset me. I calmed sat there reminding him to use an inside voice and to work on his school work. Eventually I got smart and gave him a choice. Tommy likes choices even if they are both not in his favor. He quieted down, calmed down, quickly did his homework with ease (some guidance from me) and then went to bed.