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An eyeful a day keeps the doctor away


My stats are showing many searches for the “Jonathan Hayter” article which declared “staring at women’s breasts is good for men’s health.” So I followed the original link to the newspaper clipping and sure enough the image is gone. Well, having the foresight and the ability to recognise this as a cute Photoshop job, I saved a copy of the “article” for prosperity and now that it has disappeared from its source, I re-present it to you! Posted by Hello

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Dreams

I had this bizarre dream last night that we were living in this upscale zero lot line neighborhood and my wife decides to open our house up as a deli. Suddenly the house has 14 foot ceilings, is brightly lit, and has little square tables all over the place with huge bottles of ketchup on each one. Our success booms and the desire to eat our food brings people in by the droves. We had never intended it to be more than serving a few people and stress comes as we start to worry that the health inspector will learn of our restaurant, discover we are working without permits, see our dust bunnies, and kick us out of our house.

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From the Mouths of Babes

Other things a two year old should not know how to say: “Daddy, don’t step in Molly’s poop!” not that she should not be able to grasp the words. The dog should not be doing that in the house!

Amy now is playing nicely with one of her dolls and chattering up a storm. She has such a great imagination!

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Boo!

A New Day!

Let’s start the day off with a PayPal donation link:

This Morning

Last night Tommy and I went to Cherokee Caverns (broken link atm) Haunted Cave (coupon) which has an interesting history (broken link atm). Apparently this off the beaten track cave was a popular attraction with the landowner’s house and restaruant sitting atop the cave entrance until in 1980 when a fire burned the structures to the ground. Why in 24 years something wasn’t rebuilt to showcase this beautiful cave eludes me. The formations are still mostly intact. Unfortunately, vandals have broke many of the stalactites but still not enough to ruin the cave for visitors.

The visitors were all very appropriate. No blatant drunkness. No sweet, musty smells. One adult couple (my age or older) had some laughable, rather innocent fun in the line. I think I was the only one to notice. She wore overalls. He was standing behind her hugging her but his right hand was inside the overalls down to her crotch and it was making pulsing motions. Her right hand covered her crotch like a small boy with a strong urge to pee and she had an ear to ear calm grin.

The ghouls did an awesome job. I was apprehensive because I was told that the cave was an adult experience but most of the line consisted high schoolers then there was a large contingent of 6-8 year olds. Overall the event was well done but not too scary. Our overprotective society no longer allows ghost and ghouls to physically touch their victoms so the classic surprise brushes are gone. Tommy and I pulled up the rear with the guide. I was introduced to our group of 20 or so scare victoms by the guide and throughout the tour she called to me to see if the tail was still with the group. At one point we did a trust exercise where we had to put our hands on the shoulders of the person in front of us (so Tommy was holding onto a stranger) and we walked through the pitch black of a pit full of snakes. We stepped on snakes. They bit out of ankles and hisses in our ears. Upon exiting the snake pit we stepped on a platform that vibrated so violently that I thought the roof might cave it. I expected to see the lady in overalls lying on it. I would give the Haunted Cave a recommendation for 10 years and older and a consideration for any 6 year old and older that is well adjusted and knows what to expect. Cost: $8 per person ($1 coupon handed out at the event by The Humane Society) children may be cheaper..I didn’t ask.

Outside the cave the ghouls had fog machines that poured the fog into 2 foot (.6 meter) sqaure boxes. The back panel was made of something flexible (cloth perhaps) and the front had a circle cut in it. When the back was slapped with a hand the box would fire a smoke ring 25-30 feet (7.6-9 meters). From this distance you could feel the air wack you as one cannon made fun by firing smoke rings into the crowd standing in line (we probably had 40-60 or more people in front of us and an equal number showed up behind us with more pouring in as we left). There was a child’s tent with some games (I assume this helps if a child has to be removed for being to scared). Beverages and food were available.

Much fun was had! Tommy behaved exceptionally! Twice he tried to turn to complaining (smoke and boredom in the line) but after a reminder to speak only nice things we had no more complaining.

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A New Day! Let’s start the day off with a PayPa…

A New Day!

Let’s start the day off with a PayPal donation link:

This Morning

Woke at 3am and allllmost stayed up to work! Rose at 5:30.

Let’s start the day off with politics. The lunatics are at work again. Thanks to South Knox Bubba for the link.

Bush Administration Acknowledges Grand Canyon was made by Noah’s flood not geologic forces

Washington, DC — The Bush Administration has decided that it will stand by its approval for a book claiming the Grand Canyon was created by Noah’s flood rather than by geologic forces, according to internal documents released today by Public Employees for Environmental Responsibility (PEER).

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Into the Mouths of Babe

Amy discovered she can make it up and down the stairs. She also discovered the bucket of candy I received on my birthday. She has now discovered that the gate at the top of the stairs is mounted a little too high and she has forced half her body under it. I had mounted it at the upper bounds so the cat could get under it I suppose I need to correct that. I fear she will be going over it soon.