Month: June 2005

When my bathroom sink drains slowly and I have to put clods of hair clippings out of the drain, my wife is stressed. Apparently trimming bangs is relaxing.

The little squawker has left the nest but is still protected in the wisteria. He cries out loudly periodically. Large Blue Jays have come into the area and seem to be keeping a eye on it.

…that someone absolutely abhors your very presence despite what you do?

Female doctor was in such a hurry to help stricken colleague that she forgot to put on any clothes

Tang rushed out of the bathroom in such a hurry that she forgot to put on clothes. After the security guards broke the door, she found Chen lying unconscious and stopping breathing with the shower head in his hand.

Don’t you find it rather miraculous that the security guards had the presence of mind to move? I would have thought it would have gone more like "Ok lady. Let me get my pen. Could you tell us again what’s going on? No no. Slow down and start from the VERY beginning."

Looks like our riders in Knoxville are going to be naked..and wet.

The kids found a baby Blue Jay in the driveway. What to do?

My first thoughts were that it feel a heck of a way to be on the driveway and must have its internals smashed to bits. Noah stands guard and I go get my gloves. I pick it up and it seems healthy enough walking on my hands, flapping its wings but apparently unable to fly, looking around and even squeaking a bit.

I’m a mature adult. I know you can’t save these things. Besides, Blue Jays are the rodents of the skies. They are the one bird I dislike. Good targets for BB guns (not that I do that). But I can’t help but want to help this bird.

The outdoor cat stalks 30 yards away wondering what prey we’ve caught. This creature doesn’t stand a chance. Shoe box? No way! I know better.

We even try feeding it a worm. No bite. It simply falls asleep in my palm.

The middle 3 kids assist me in a hunt of the yard with a flashlight for a safe place for this bird. There is no such thing. The best place we can find is smack dab in the outdoor cat’s killzone. We concede and prepare the space. It’s a knot hole in the old sycamore (I think) tree nearest our house. I line it with some hay and let the bird crawl into it. The poor thing seems in shock. I give it a few hours before its on the ground. 20 minutes after that the cat will torture it for about 8 minutes and then its dead and left as a "gift" on the porch. Hopefully I see it before the kids.

Update: It lived through the night. Apparently I build a good nest.

Dad: Amy, do you know what today is?
Amy, matter of factly: It’s my birthday. I’m 3.

Noah got to her first

In keeping with this week’s unintential theme of nudity and since Saturday is the World Naked Bike Ride, The Daily Tribube brings us A Pound of PETA

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, or PETA, member Chris Link of Norfolk, Va., top, adjusts the cellophane covering on the costume of demonstrator Dezeray Rubinchik of Philadelphia, top right, during a protest in front of the Statehouse, in Providence, R.I., Monday, June 6, 2005.

The one in the middle looks quite tender!

On Tuesday, I posted "One For the Boys" and I really hope all the guys took some time to watch.

Now thanks to OuthouseRag.com I can post One For the Girls! This is required watching and completely safe for work. Needs sound.

Steve Pavlina tells us How to Give Up Coffee

Caffeine is the modern drug of choice in the work world, easily accessible, socially acceptable, readily affordable, and of course perfectly legal. … caffeine is addictive

Steve suggests two methods: switch from coffee to herbal tea; or switch from coffee to grain coffee. He also explains why to give up coffee. Rather that reproduce bits and pieces here, I recommend you give Steve’s article a read.

Other resources:

• top reasons to be caffeine free
  • Caffeine Sensitivity
  • Weight Loss
  • Health Crisis
  • Pregnancy & Nursing
  • Aging & Stress
  • Sleep & Mood Disturbance
  • The Pursuit of Optimal Health
• Tea – Micronutrient Information Center
• how ecologically devastating it is that “poor” countries grow coffee to pay off their country’s debts, at the cost of degradation to rainforests
• Caffeine alternative – WARNING! Some evil web developer thinks it is ok to resize your browser window (it doesn’t resize anymore)
• Caffeine Addiction Is a Mental Disorder
• 11 steps to a better brain

Ok. One more bare naked post and then I’ll return to tamer topics.

This morning I’m driving around and I casually look to my left to find lo’ and behold! the rather attractive female driver next to me is topless! As she stretches her arms up to pull her sports bra on she saw me seeing her, drops her garment into her lap and pulls her vehicle forward. Being the gentleman that I am I avert my eyes as soon as she is out of sight.

Quote on a billboard near the incident: “Girls, if it’s not for sale, don’t advertise it!”

It’s 2:30am, the sky is dry, thunder is booming and I’m awake and focused for productivity! If only I can fight the urge to sleep until about noon.

Since my last post One for the Boys should have left all the guys with their hands on their testicles, if they followed instructions, I figure I should stick with a body theme! Again, guys, really, go to that link and watch the whole thing with sound on.

(warning! links in this paragraph might contain naked people) This Saturday, June 11 is World Naked Bike Ride 2005! Over 50 cities are participating and Knoxville is one of them! Yes, Knoxville! We have guests on Saturday but if they leave as early as I expect and I could get my bike that is rusting in the driveway working I’d consider the ride! Since it is unlikely that I could get the bike working, I suppose I could do my part and simply photo-document the event.

On June 11, 2005, over 54 cities across the world will experience the naked joy of the world’s largest naked protest against oil dependency and car culture in the history of humanity. Last year progressive cities from Sydney to Seattle to Asheville played host to this fun but serious protest calling poignant attention to our need to lessen our dependence on petroleum fuels and the harm we are doing to all of humanity and nature.

It looks like Knoxville’s ride is sponsored by (or at least promoted by) East TN Bares "A Naturist Community – Devoted To Promoting The Nudist Lifestyle In East Tennessee".

Alright guys. Don’t chicken out. This requires sound. All men must watch this! (probably want to watch from home)

Atten Hut!

There are certain things that you in no way can be prepared. Somethings you can be told but it is not real until you experience it yourself. Take for instance, infant boys. You can read books, listen to other people’s stories, and take advice from your doctor but nothing prepares you for the day that you open the diaper on your 9 day old son and there he is at full attention in all his manliness! After doing a double or triple take, what can you do other than tout, "Hey hey! Thaaat’s my BOY!"

Take Cover!

Now Amy was a good infant. Didn’t fight diaper changes. Evan has strong legs. He takes to kicking and pumping those legs as if to say, "keep that thing off of me!" He also has some accolades that Amy never received. In his first 9 days of life, Evan has managed to pee on me and the couch and last night scored in the game of "poop on Dad."