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Oral Fixations – Kiss me and we’ll wait

I don’t think any parent wants to truly deal with the subject of sex and their kids. There is morality versus missed opportunities. It feels good but don’t do it. They are going to do it anyway but they need to save themselves. The church says you are going to hell and it is very disconcerning to shake hands with someone with such hairy palms. You want to teach them safety but not encourage or plant suggestions. And the last thing you want is for them to experience the heartbreaks after being used or thinking they found deep love only to be stone cold dumped. Of course, you have to deal with that double standard that boys are supposed to hunt while girls are supposed to wear chastity belts. Do you want your boys labeled "studs" while trying to keep your girls from being labeled "sluts?" And I’m not ready to be a grandparent!

Now enter the studies. The U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention tells us teenagers that have oral sex delay vaginal intercourse.

By the time they are 22 to 24 — when most individuals have already had intercourse — those having only oral sex drops to 3 percent, suggesting to experts that young people are using oral sex to postpone vaginal sex.

So whatcha talkin’ about Willis?! Here’s a twisted interpretation: Is the CDC implying that as a parent I should encourage my kids to engage in oral sex in order to keep them from having intercourse? Could you see the new sex education classes? "Ok ladies, this is called the "to the moon" technique. Guys, remember, slow is good too and circles, I say, small circles."

As a guy, I have a hard time believing that their study holds up. I would think oral sex more of a "gateway drug" to intercourse. In high school, boys talk. I remember conversations with my friends: "I got to third!" "3rd base?! I only got to first with her." And thus she becomes hunted because now everyone knows she puts out.

I like Dr. James Allen‘s statement on the study:

It confirms the fact that, despite what our Washington leaders think and want, our youth are sexually active, and adults are sexually active and a lot of it appears not to be within a marital setting.

This country’s leadership is stuck in a timewarp, out of touch and trying to rein us back into bygone times.

The highlights from the study:

  • Ninety-seven percent of men and 98 percent of women aged 25 to 44 have had vaginal intercourse.
  • Ninety percent of men and 88 percent of women reported having had oral sex with an opposite-sex partner.
  • Forty percent of men and 35 percent of women have had anal sex with an opposite-sex partner.
  • Men aged 30 to 44 reported an average of six to eight female sexual partners so far while women reported about four. This is similar to studies conducted in the early 1990s.
  • About 6.5 percent of men aged 25 to 44 have had oral or anal sex with another man. Three percent of males 15 to 44 years have had oral or anal sex with another male in the last 12 months (1.8 million people).
  • Eleven percent of women aged 25 to 44 reported having had a sexual experience with another woman. Four percent of females reporting having a sexual experience with another female in the last 12 months.
  • Six percent of males and 11 percent of females had had same-sex contact in their lifetimes. While this percentage remains relatively unchanged for men since the early 1990s, the proportion of women has soared unexpectedly from 4 or 5 percent to 14 percent among women aged 18 to 29. “We may want to consider the possibility that women are trying to reduce their risk of STDs,” Mosher said.
  • Ninety percent of men aged 18 to 44 thought of themselves as heterosexual, 2.3 percent as homosexual. 1.8 percent bisexual and 3.9 percent “something else” while the rest did not answer the question. The numbers were almost exactly the same for women.
  • Twenty-nine percent of men who had ever had sexual contact with another man were tested for HIV in the past year compared with 14 percent of men with no same-sex contact.
  • Seventeen percent of men who had ever had sexual contact with another male had been treated for a non-HIV STD, compared with 7 percent of those who had never had male-on-male sexual contact.
  • Among men 15 to 44 who had at least one sexual partner in the last 12 months, 39 percent used a condom at their most recent encounter. The figure was 65 percent among never-married males and 24 percent among married males. Ninety-one percent of males who had ever had sexual contact with another male used a condom the last time they had sex, compared with 36 percent of men who never had sex with another male.

My concluding thoughts? Sure sounds like being a teen now-a-days would be a lot of fun! Oh, what am I going to tell my kids? My statement is basically "please wait but if you are going to anyway here’s your parental lesson on STDs, HIV, babies and safe sex…" As for oral sex, it’s still sex.

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