Dear Family,
I am aware that some of you are afraid there are monsters hiding in the shower so you leave the shower curtain open. I would prefer it closed. The benefits of closing the shower curtain after your bath or shower are that the curtain is less likely to mildew plus you can read that cool periodic table of elements. I believe I have a solution! I have mounted a video camera in the shower. Simply point your browser to 192.267.0.389:null and you can see that there are no monsters in the shower.
That is all. And thank you for your cooperation!
Love, Dad
Someday, a mutant brown recluse spider will hop out from behind that curtain when you are sitting and unable to stand.