I’d like to spend all day cleaning out the garage. What’s this chain doing attached from my ankle to my computer?
Blog
-
Note to the DJ
When trying to have an intimate moment with the wife, romance turns to comedy when the music switches from Led Zeppelin to Meatloaf’s "Paradise by the Dashboard Light" mid-act. I think that’s the first time in my life I’ve actually been able to act that song out…while the song was playing! -
This world is small!
A friend, an online friend, whom I have never met in person, was called by someone who now has one of my old cellphone numbers that I quit using about 7 years ago. We know this because my name was still associated with that phone number in his cellphone’s address book and he thought it was me calling. So what exactly are the odds of someone being assigned one of your old, defunct phone numbers accidentally calling a friend of yours in another state? And why can’t I win the lottery?
-
Mistake Defined
Mistake [mi-steyk] n.,v. To drink a half a pot of coffee then try to program while listening to a thunderstorm as white noise.
-
My family is trying to kill me
I have a challenge ahead of me that is keeping me on the computer night and day. Last night at midnight I decided to rest a couple of hours then try to work through the night but it would take all night to get those couple of hours:
- midnight: I close my eyes.
- 12:15am: Evan comes into the room and asks for yogurt.
- 12:15am-2:30am: The rumbling of the thunderstorm keeps me tossing an turning. Exhausted but unable to rest.
- 3am: I realize the thunder is actually my daughter trying to put together a desk in the room above us.
- 4am: Dog asks to go outside. I brush her off as neurotic.
- 5am: I concede she’s not neurotic and take her for a walk. She really needed to go out.
- 5am-8am: Score some sleep!
-
Happy Birthday Aunt Carmen!
My sister-in-law turns..um..21 today! Happy birthday Carmen! One day I’m going to write all these dates down. It would appear that every relative (with just a couple of exceptions) was born in May and June.
-
News Sentinel tries hard sell for old ways in Walgreens
I ran into Walgreens hoping for the world’s quickest pickup of a product that I now know you have to buy at Target and was accosted at the door.
Sales guy, holding out Walgreens printed circular (the bait): "Would you like this week’s ads?"
Me, no I don’t because I came in for a single product but being a dumb human (the nibble): "Sure."
Sales guy (the hook): "Would you like a Walgreens gift card?"
Me, quickly noting the stack of News Sentinel papers (the denial): "No thank you. I don’t need a paper."
Sales guy (the switch): "Are you sure you don’t want a News Sentinel?"
Me (attempted escape): "I read it online."
Sales guy (the lie): "At only 38 cents a day, there’s value in the print edition you can’t get online."
Me (the truth): "Honestly, I’m never going to read a paper ever again." (and I won’t pay for it online either)The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Mon – Thurs 11p / 10c End Times Daily Show
Full EpisodesPolitical Humor Newt Gingrich Unedited Interview You know who would love this? My grandma! [Source, The Daily Show’s Jason Jones, End Times 2:41-2:46]
Thanks to Cathy for pointing to the video!
-
Happy Birthday Amy!
Amy has been 7 years of joy (and some frustrations) for me! She is full of life, confident, hardheaded, funny, adventurous, emotional, intelligent and so much more. I am lucky to have such a child for a daughter. Happy birthday Amy! -
When should you buy a new computer?
Occasionally somebody will ask me for my expert advice and question, "when should I buy a new computer?" My answer is often to discuss the benefits of a new machine, and how in many cases it is cheaper to replace rather than repair and upgrade, but ultimately my answer is a question, "is the machine doing what you need it to do?" If the answer is yes, then don’t buy a new computer.
I just turned on my Windows 98 machine. Yes. Windows 98…first edition not second edition. Why? Because GIMP frustrates me and my copy of Adobe Photoshop 5.5 still produces great imagery for much of my work. See, this machine still does what I need it to do. So, I have no need to upgrade this 11 year old box.
Update: I’ve been introduced to GIMPshop. Feels like a crutch but I may have to try it anyway.
-
I’m in print!
Some of my digital words seem to have leaked into today’s newspaper! Go to Knoxnews and read Teach cell phones, don’t ban them. Comments are open on Knoxnews or commentary can be added at the School Matters website.
-
Slip Sliding Away
I was having this discussion
In a taxi heading downtown
Rearranging my position
On this friend of mine who had
A little bit of a breakdown
I said breakdowns come
And breakdowns go
So what are you going to do about it
That’s what I’d like to know
[Source, Paul Simon, Gumboots] -
That’s not how Saturday’s should go
I had a terribly upsetting afternoon. I am physically shaken. Think I’ll clean the basement to get my mind back in order.