Reality Me

Blog

  • Heading to the trenches

    Yesterday I inspected the trench that one day will become a French drain which keeps water out of our basement on heavy rains only to discover that a wall has partially collapsed. With rain in the forecast for Sunday night and Monday, I have to redig the trench or face having a pool of water that will slowly seep into the basement.

    What prevents me from completing the trench? Higher priority projects, time, money and materials. The digging of the trench has to be completed. Long ago I concluded that renting a backhoe or paying someone to complete the excavation would be wiser than digging the rest out myself. I am going all the way down to the footers so that this repair is as long lasting as possible and adds value to the house. I need 2-3 dump truck loads of 3/4inch gravel. Tar for the wall. A thick millimeter plastic or other liner to go on top of the tarred wall. 4 inch heavy PVC with holes drilled in it OR ceramic weeping pipe as the drain. Must debate the pros and cons of wrapping the pipe in fabric as it helps keep sediment from clogging the pipe but the filtering material itself can become clogged and defeat the purpose of the pipe. May be better to have an easily accessible cleanout from the driveway. Need backfill dirt. Additionally I may take advantage of the exposed wall to run an additional waste water pipe to the property waste water main pipe so that sinks, or a washing machine could easily be installed in close proximity to the front wall of the house in the basement or garage. Estimated cost to complete the French drain project: $600-1200.

  • Watchmen Review – No Spoiler

    Who Watches the Watchmen?Cathy and I were privileged to go see the midnight showing of Watchmen last night. (See Official Watchmen website) First a note to myself: if you are going to act like a college student and watch a 3 hour movie starting at midnight, set an alarm for the morning. I lay in bed this morning trying to convince myself it was Saturday; then Noah’s whisper, "Dad. It’s 7:15" startles me from bed. Fortunately, everyone made it to school on time…and with lunches!

    My Thoughts

    In short: Go see this movie! But leave the children at home.

    Astounding! Lighting choices, sets, camera angles, use of slow motion and stop action made me not want to blink. They sucked me into the screen and I did not want to miss a millisecond. The vivid colors and contrasts brought enough comic book element without crossing the cheesy boundary. The sounds were crisp and took great advantage of the theater setting. This movie certainly deserves at least one viewing on a big screen. The musical soundtrack was perfect falling into the must purchase category. The story was well told. The movie ran three hours and I was glued to the screen for every second. I may even go back and watch Watchmen in the Imax theater!

    Rating/Parent Warning

    Watchmen is rated R for strong graphic violence, sexuality, nudity and language. As you drop your children off at the theater to watch this movie based on a comic book, remember that comic books were not always written for children. This is an adult movie. Watchmen has graphic violence that may turn some heads from the screen. The sex in the movie is hot! And only outdone by the sex after the movie. [pseudo spoiler]You will see breasts, nipples, butts and penises. You will see blood.

    History

    Read wikipedia’s Watchmen article for a great description of how Watchmen came to exist. In short, Watchmen represented a stark change from how superheros were typically represented. Even the presentation of the comic book was different in style. In high school, I was a comic book collector and a huge D.C. fan. I visited monthly comic book conventions and had my own "pusher" who would advise me on the hot series. I was really into the miniseries. I found Crisis on Infinite Earths very exciting as the D.C. continuity problems were to finally be fixed but all the tie ins and crossover series burned me out on comic collecting. Unfortunately, I quit collecting comics in 1986 when Frank Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns was released. My pusher insisted that was a story I shouldn’t miss and that it would instantly be valuable. He was right. I should own the first release of The Dark Knight and I should have Watchmen. I remember Watchmen, but regretfully, I do not think I have a single issue downstairs. Cool! Last night I dug out my old comic box and discovered I have the entire 12 issue Watchmen series in bagged in mint condition! I suppose I should say near mint; nothing is every truly mint. I even have 2 copies of issue 12. The desire to take them out and flip through their pages is almost worth more than the $250 the set appears to be going for on eBay. What I do have is the Punisher series but that movie was rotten. But I digress. Quit reading this and go watch the movie!

  • From the mouths of babes

    Saying Grace:

    Amy: "Thank you God for all this food and for the whole world you made well and Ben Franklin but you made most of he well he made some of .. ah somethings and since you made this world we should help you and thank you Amen."

    Evan: "Thank you God for this food and for the bunnies helped make food and now we scare the bunnies away…and the sharks. Eeeeemen."

  • Dad of the Year!

    It just occurred to me that I sent my little girl to school with an empty lunchbox today. Oh I’m going to get it when she comes home!

  • Do you dream in color?

    Apparently I dream in Green. Last night, I had vivid dreams of competing with Ed Begley Jr. and Bill Nye for the most environmentally sound lifestyle. Uh, fantasy dreams? How could I possibly compete in an eco war with those two?! See Ed Begley Jr.’s FAQ.

  • Why yes I have heroes! And one is coming to Knoxville!

    My heroes and role models center around comedians. The list of influences is huge including Red Fox, Steve Martin, Bill Cosby, Rick Moranis, Dave Thomas…hold on…basically the SCTV and Saturday Night Live casts. I can narrow the list to four people: Gene Wilder, Richard Pryor, Bill Murray, and Robin Williams. When I was around twelve years old, Robin Williams got me in a bunch of trouble when I did his "moisture heat seeking missile" routine that involved a lot of pelvic gyrations for some guests my parents were entertaining. I had no idea what I was doing or saying. The guests were rolling on the floor and my father was fuming. That was my first Carlos Mencia lesson: don’t perform other people’s material.

    Robin Williams is coming to Knoxville on April 11th to the Civic Auditorium! There’s even a VIP Meet & Greet package available! Well, he may be coming to Knoxville. His doctor has advised him to skip four Florida scheduled shows due to recent heart surgery.

    On August 20, 2007, Williams’ elder brother, Robert Todd Williams, died of complications from heart surgery performed a month earlier. [Source, Wikipedia, Robin Williams]

    I wish I was still participating in the Red Cross’ FAST program or that I could justify a ticket. Maybe Robin Williams wants to give himself an intermission during the show and would like a juggler to come on stage with him!

  • From the mouths of babes

    Amy, 6.5: "Daddy, your belly is BIG!"
    Dad: "Is that a good thing or a bad thing?"
    Amy: "I don’t know. It’s just funny looking." She then proceeds to put on some Teen Spirit deodorant that her 15.5 year old sister gave her. I’ll tell you what’s funny looking!

  • Technologies to come

    Someone titled this "Microsoft’s Vision for 2019" I don’t know if that is true or not. What I do know is that much of what is presented in this video is already in the works. I’ve seen some of it demo’d. I know we have the technology to be deploying some of it today but necessary infrastructure improvements and profit margins stand in the way. For instance, if Nokia has a plan to release version A B C D and E of a phone there is a good chance that while were are using version A that B C D and E are in the works if not already developed. If B and E were developed at the same time Nokia could sell E but would miss out on all the profits by release B then waiting awhile to release C and awhile longer to release D and so forth. It doesn’t make fiscal sense to jump ahead. If money were not the issue and the technology improvements were solely about the advancement of society, you can bet we’d jump from A to E.

    2019 is too far away. We need these technologies today! Freeze me and wake me in 100 years.

    Update: Take a look at how AT&T envisioned the future back in 1993. Pretty amazingly on the nose!

  • From the mouths of babes

    Evan, 3.5 years old: "Why da?"
    Dad, proper answer: "Because ____ _ ____ ___ _ ___"
    Evan: "But why da?"
    Dad, similar answer with more descriptive words: "Because ____ ____ _ ____ ___ ___ _ ___ ____ and _____"
    Evan: "Dad, but why?"
    Dad: "Uh. Because."
    Evan: "But why because?"
    Dad: "I don’t know."
    Evan: "But why?" "Why?" "WHY?"
    Dad: *brain melts*

    Evan: "Crocodiles are going to eat your feet."
    Dad: "What?"
    Evan: "Crocdiles going to eat your feet. Got to put your feet on the boat Dad."
    Dad, places feet on the chair in front of him.
    Evan: "Now crocodiles won’t get your feet."

  • Today’s Glorious Spam

    Today I got spammed on Twitter by someone trying to get me to join a lesbian match making website. Uh. I think I fail most of the criteria. You know. Like I’m not single. Cathy and I haven’t reached the swingers or wife swapping point in our relationship yet. Oh, yeah. I don’t have a vagina!

    ps. If you are going to trick me into going to an adult website, you could at least provide a thumbnail gallery! Just kidding. I’m not conservative enough for viewing porn and I don’t live in Utah. (NewScientist: Porn in the USA: Conservatives are biggest consumers )

  • From the mouths of babes

    Doug: "Did you read my post?"
    Cathy: "Um. Well. It was kinda long. I scanned it."

  • How to become an outdoor cat

    Becoming an outdoor cat is simple. Just sit on your master’s desk and when he disturbs your slumber by moving the computer mouse, draw blood by attacking his hand. Nooo! Don’t go to the "trying to save you from the mouse" defense!

    Oh, whichever crazy cat person talked me into not declawing that cat, you were wrong.

  • The New York Times is following me on Twitter!

    So I’m 1 of 992 people that The New York Times is following on Twitter! Does that make me a new source? A lead generator? Am I newsworthy?! Oh wait a minute. 992 is just under 1000 followers. Did The Grey Lady just spam me?!

  • N.E.W.S. times are a changin’

    N.E.W.S. – Notable Experience Was Scrutinized (or Noble Elitist Writers Soapbox)

    What’s new in the news now? People are all a buzz…better…people are all a twitter about the death of the newspaper business. Ironically nicknamed deadwood, the printed word is dying. Newspapers are following the slide projector. Newspapers, once the cornerstone of public opinion, are struggling to re-establish themselves, figure out how to be profitable, and not get closed down. Newspapers used to be accepted as gospel. The tone of the printed word could set public opinion and decide political careers and was regarded by the public as "fair and unbiased" when in truth the newspaper is controlled by either an editor who can influence the tone set by the paper or corporation whose agenda may side with printing the opinion or running a story with a twist that brings in the most money. Pajamas Media argues that news should not be fair and balanced. So with papers dying, where will news come from? The Associated Press says to listen to the bloggers and the social media entrepreneurs. News is turning from the professional journalists who seek it out to the amateur writer who is experiencing the news as it happens. I want papers to succeed. Without the newspaper, society will crumble! How will we train our dogs? What will childhood be like without that disgusting smell of wet flour and strips of paper for sculpting? What will our parents stare blankly at while struggling to remember if this is their first or second bowl of bran cereal for the day?

    N.E.W.S. – Now Everyone Writes Something

  • Of Grasshoppers

    Student: How will I be remembered when I am gone?
    Master: You will be forgotten.