Reality Me

Birth
My next and last child is due today. We have been hoping he would come for the past 2 weeks. Of course the paperwork has not, and may still not, be in order. I’d feel a lot better if I could pay the $2700 up front fees requested by the hospital. I fear since we may enter as "those cash people that we will never see money from" that we will not be treated as well as the insured or weathly. It’s a very wrong mindset as the bills will be paid. If all goes well, our insurance paperwork went through yesterday or goes through today however it could take up to 30 days.

Poverty
I hate the thought that my son may be disadvantaged because of his treatment in the hospital just because I’ve made too little money. My bad choices are now costing my family. We need a van and much work to the house. I need a haircut. We need groceries.

Improvements
On the positive side I feel more order in my life. I have closure to several things including client projects and personal burdens. I need some more closure! And a few new beginnings.

I’ve made great strides in clearing up some support issues for a client today. I like getting things done. In that view, Tim contributes the following enlightenment on inner peace:

This is something we can all use and benefit from, as we all need more calm in our lives.

By following the simple advice heard on the Dr.Phil Show, I have finally found inner peace. Dr.Phil’s way to inner peace, is to finish all the things you have started. So I looked around my house to see things that I had started and hadn’t finished, and before leaving for work this morning, I finished off a bottle of merlot, a bottle of chardonnay,a bottle of Baileys, a bottle of Kahlua, a packet of TimTams, the rest of the cheesecake, a box of chocolates,and the remainder of both Prozac and Valium prescriptions. You have no idea how freaking good I feel!!!!

A professional is someone who can do his best work when he doesn’t feel like it.
– Alistair Cooke

Check out this government sponsored humiliation!

I know some people are inherently bad but might situation contribute to some of these bad neighbors? Instead of chiding them online might humanitarian effort be better spent organizing a work party to help get these bad neighbors back on their feet. Perhaps that technique is used once and if they slip again then we resort to the humiliation. Granted, some of these folks have received multiple citations but a piece of paper does not lift one from their troubles.

I know when my world collapsed in 2000 and my garbage service abruptly ended that my trash was just plopped on the driveway and began to decompose. I had a pile that would have impressed Arlo Gutherie and Alice and should have been setting off contamination sensors in Oak Ridge. No number of citations would have encouraged me to get out of bed and address the trash. When I finally broke out of my depression and started taking the trash to the dump it probably took 12 trips using my 4×8 trailer.

My point is that people sometimes fall into bad situations. We have volunteers that get together and build homes for Habitat for Humanity. Imagine what a similar effort could do for our communities by addressing issues such as these. I know if 20 people showed up at my house one weekend I could accomplish what I have failed to do in 7 years (if I had the materials).

As a home office worker learning to prioritize is critical. Thanks to Stephen R Covey

I keep my stress low when the children need attention at the same time I am trying to reach a goal. When I try to compete between the child and work by redirecting her or trick her into leaving me alone I’m faced with interuption upon interuption; however, if I take some time away from my work and invest some quality time with the child, we both have a rewarding time and her need for attention is fulfilled enough for me to return to some solid work.

This morning Amy and I played a fun game of memory. She did really well! Now she watches Sesame Street while I work but I must admit the television drags me in sometimes.

Man I was exhausted today! The Internet connection problem became very bad. Comcast seems confused as to how to address it but the issue is running up the flag pole. I’ve become that “Oh, we’ve heard about you” customer.

I received a letter from DHS requesting more paperwork with a “we must turn you down unless received by ____” letter so my afternoon was spent photocopying and compiling financial information. That’s a good thing. It’s forced me to move forward with my impending tax deadline. I’ve become organized and really gotten on the stick with somethings that have loomed over my head for quite a while.

So the Comcast technician came out again yesterday and said, “Everything at your house is fine. It’s up to the line guys now.” When prompted about changing out the modem he implied that it wouldn’t do any good. He also said it was a coincidence that the splitter made any difference that Comcast’s “equipment is designed for their system.” Apparently today the line guys will be out to look at the wires on the poles. Let’s hope they find a problem and fix it because this is beginning to impact my work.

As I grow older and wiser I begin to understand that there is a reason the man leaves the house at 7am for the office and returns home at 6pm after working 8-5.

Student: I’d like to be someone that I’m not.
Master: You are whom you choose to be.

I sat on the porch for a view to give the dog time to do her business. She chose to stay on the porch and stare at the cat. However, it gave me a moment to thoroughly enjoy the stillness of the night. At 3:30am it was particularly quiet. Only 1 cricket chirped. Only one a/c unit hummed in the distance and it was almost inaudible. Briefly one car was heard then none. For a moment something fell through a distant tree and a critter complained. Then absolute silence. The sky was clear and the stars were strong yet they would have been stronger without the light polution of two neighbors’ porch lights. Why must those lights be on whilst they sleep?

I like the early mornings on the porch. Often I feel I could sleep there nicely. Its a good way to start the day.

I’m worried about my teeth. I’m worried about my wife’s teeth. I’m worried about my toddler’s teeth.

Alright! Got my incense burning, candle lit and Jimmy humming tunes. This evening: Beach House on the Moon

2004 taxes provisionally done! Paperwork to insurance people filed. Cross your fingers and we deliver this baby with insurance!

Listening to Levellers – A weapon called the Word

Put Amy down for nap. Fixed lunch for self. Ate Amy’s lunch.