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Have you ever really felt pain?

My stomach hurts. My back and neck hurt. My mind aches. My soul bleeds. I look back hoping to see how far I have come, only to realize, my journey has just begun. I thought they paved the road ahead of me. Perhaps I left the path. This thicket is prickly and dense and makes me long for a second chance. The easy road is over there. No path goes that way. At the end, I wonder if I will look back to realize my journey has just begun, or realize, instead of seeking pain, I should have had fun.

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Morning Frustrations

I planned on being at a client’s office at 7am this morning and skipping lunch so I could get back home for a productive afternoon. However, a nervous stomach and throbbing head kept me in bed. I don’t use an alarm clock but I sure have a snooze alarm. When a 100 pound German Shepherd rolls over on your legs, it is like having an extra feather down quilt thrown over you on a cold, lazy winter Saturday. Molly obviously knew I needed some extra Zzzs.

So, the stomach bug has Cathy too. It’s 9:35am and I have been unable to leave the house. She’s camped out in the water closet, Amy has me cooking cinnamon rolls, and other distractions have kept me chained to these 4 walls.

So, instead of getting anything done, I am pacing the floors and debating just staying home to work on other high priority projects.

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What do you dream?

Last night I dreamt that I solved a mathematical proof that no one else had ever done. I was in a debate with colleagues over how the equation would graph and in the dream I held a piece of graph paper where we had begun our chart of the data. It was evident that the equation would graphic either into a logarithmic curve or an endless spiral.

In another dream, I had gone back to school and was living in a single dorm room in Greeve Hall, an all boys dorm on the UT campus, but in the dream it was located on the same side of the street as Clement Hall. One part of the dream had something to do with playing cards. Another part had to do with my friend Vania making a huge cry for attention by climbing to an unsafe height and announcing to the corridor that he had a plan. The head resident, a woman, disgusted with me how she felt he was making an huge cry for attention. The dream had great detail from the cherry hand rails to the elaborate paneling on the walls and a jaunt outside revealed a store on the first floor with a variety of vividly colored items inside.

The second dream did not top the proof dream. I woke almost able to write out the formula.