Year: 2004

Student: Professor, I have amounted to nothing. My life is a waste!

Professor: So what are your plans for tomorrow?

At eleven I act five

I wish my breast were alive

I think I deserve to be seventeen

Give me independence

Don’t be so mean

When I am there

I can declare I am free to be me

When I am there

He is not here

And I can worry only about me

My parents are dorks

One brother is a jerk

The other a pain

My sister is adorable

But only when we are playing

I hear them say I am smart

Which means I am special

So I mouth off alot

It is what adults do

And I have to be as responsible as you

Student: Why start? I’ll probably do it wrong anyway. Why finish? It won’t be good enough.

Master: Isn’t something never begun wrong already? How is the next great adventure to begin if the prior is not placed behind us?

West

Today the toilet overflowed potentially damaging our cabinetry and tainting the insulation and other wall innards that were pieced together with such care, perfection and attention to detail. It overflowed because I was overconfident and careless.

East

Today we were given inspiration to finish some things that we were waiting to “get around to it”. Today started out great and has been given reason to be even better. Today we are reminded to take things in stride.

North

Today no one was hurt. With minimal effort a mess was cleaned. All damage easily repaired.

South

Today tools were out of place. Parts were missing. Today I felt lost, incapable, lazy and not living up to my full potential. Today I scared my child and insulted my wife.

Student: Why is the crib moved out of place?

Teacher: Why does it matter?

Choas reigns

In perpetuity the circle spins

Hands grasping at grains

Unstoppable

Tears removing happiness

Innocence bellows away

Desire seeks the path of least resistance

Following downward deeper into despair

Futilely Man tells Nature The Order

Scornfully Nature disciplines Man

The Law is unforgiving

Inaction is individualist

Unallowable

Hurtful to others

Ambivalence is a choice

There is no easy way out

Of a hole that only grows deeper

When the dirt you throw out

Never reaches the top

And all you want to do

Is stop stop stop

Trauma to begin

Trauma to grow

Trauma to end

A butterfly in Kansas

A tsunami in Japan

A farmboy with a magnifying glass

A sudden calm in the storm

A tired child rests

The hay flares up

And Choas reigns

Don’t try. It’s a waste of time.

A New Day!

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This Morning

Only got up to clean dog poo twice last night and only neglected to procrastinate on it because of the rancid smell. I must find time to learn how to train the dog..of course, having a backdoor that opened would help and having a thick lawn of soft grass instead of hard dirt and sticks would make a huge difference. All in good time.

Blast! I forgot my errand I was going to run on the way home. Time time time….no time.. It’s a Monday task now.

So I was hungry this morning and cooked 5 eggs to share with Amy, Cathy and Tommy. Ran out of time and had to take Noah to Zoo Camp so I figured with the past few times the eggs were prepared, there were always some left over and I’d have a few when I got home. I know Amy had some. I had a nibble. And Cathy had a bite. Tommy ate nearly all of the 5 scrambled eggs and one slice of toast. Cathy wanted to hide this fact from me because she was afraid of my reaction. I am confused. I reacted with surprise not anger and surprise that Tommy would be so thoughtless as to horde the eggs from his mother; I really didn’t care that I did not get any and cared more that Tommy is gorging himself more and more. I reacted with action not violence. I required Tommy to get dressed and work off a few calories. Of course, he responded with “I don’t like exercise and I won’t.” So he now sits on the front porch grousing. Cathy is tense around me and I am befuddled. I suppose I am to cater to Tommy’s every whim just to keep happy. During times like this I feel like the happiest families are the ones where the man goes to work (out of the house 40+ hours a week) and just accepts whatever happens at the house and does only what the wife tells him “I[wife] need you to discipline the child and this is what is to be done.” “yes dear.”

Had one of those 15 minute naps today that just blow your mind. You wake in a sudden panic thinking you’ve been down for hours but it turns out to be 15 minutes so you allow yourself to lie down again and then you are there for 2 hours.

A New Day!

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This Morning

Drove through the night to get home. Nearly drove into the concrete barrier once and decided to sleep in a parking lot for a little bit before continuing. Took another cat nap a short time later and finally got home at 5:15am to find the dog found new places to defile, and the children had crawled in the bed with Mom leaving nothing but floor for me to sleep on (I finagled some room at the foot of the bed with the dog). After a brief rest I took Noah to Zoo Camp to discover that I was wrong about the phone bill…I had not paid it. In hind sight I should have called and asked them yesterday but we got cut off again. I tried reestablishing the service but was cut off twice, one operator hung up on me because the Jeep was too noisy and when I got home the dog pulled the phone from my hand disconnecting my call a fourth time. I gave up.

Arrived safely. 2 hour 53 minutes.

—

Mobile Email from a Cingular Wireless Customer http://www.cingular.com

Nothing profound but fun nonetheless.

Pictures from the phone

I have this eighteen wheeler of caskets riding beside me. Reminds one to be extra safe.

Answered an part-time asp/.net/sql position from Sunday’s paper. Accepted a contract in Nashville for a wiring installation. Hopefully I can get up and back in 9 hours.

Now I must make sure the house doesn’t loose utilities while I am gone.