From the mouths of babes September 11, 2008 8:31 am
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Dharma, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes, Molly, Noah, Of Being Dad, Pets , 1 comment so farAmy, three, with Noah, twelve, beside her: "Can the dogs go with us to school?" (she means carpool)
Dad: "Sure but don’t let them in the car until I wipe their feet."
Noah, Evan, Amy and the dogs walk out the door. Dad from the front porch hollers: "Don’t let the dogs in the car until their feet get wiped."
Noah walks to car and puts hand on door handle. Dad yells: "Don’t let the dogs in the van!"
Noah opens the door and lets Dharma in with no effort to stop her.
Dad goes on a tirade: {this part is unprintable}
Noah: "I thought you were talking to Amy."
What is parenting? September 9, 2008 6:35 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Evan, Family, Noah, Of Being Dad , add a commentParenting is not getting upset about spending $29 on what you thought was a child-friendly dinner only to have 3 children decide not to eat.
Update: A fourth child stayed at a friend’s house because their Chinese food sounded better than our dinner. The fifth child had cheese cake because he’s away at the university.
add a commentOops September 5, 2008 8:56 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Evan, Family, Noah, Of Being Dad , add a commentLost my temper with the twelve year old because he acted like a 12 year old boy. No! Not that. He was supposed to be watching the little ones while I did some programming and worked on the plumbing but he got drawn into his Playstation2, the one I told him not to play. I demonstrated anger, made 2 children cry, and now everyone (mostly Mom) is justifiably mad at me. Sometimes I wish I could roll the clock back just a few minutes and have a little do-over. Hugs, humility and apologies went all around. Tears were brushed away. But the damage is done. Self-flagellation ahead.
add a commentEvening is upon us - Football! September 5, 2008 6:42 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Cathy, Daily Life, Evan, Family, Noah, Of Being Dad, Sarah, Tommy , add a commentBearden High School has a home game tonight. Sarah will be demonstrating her excellence. Last year we discovered it was neither cost effective or prudent to take the whole family so Cathy and I take turns going to the games to support the teamflags. Alright, usually Cathy goes. So tonight’s evening chaos is brought to you by Liquid Plumber, The BHS Band Boosters, McDonald’s, and the RedCross babysitting training. Participants in tonight’s chaos are Amy, Evan, Noah, and Dad. Absence from this evenings show is Tommy who stayed at the college to chill with his hommies, Sarah who when not flirting with Zak is spinning flags on the field, and Mom who is taking pictures of Sarah flirting with Zak. Mom shoves down a McDonald’s cheese burger and is out the door leaving Noah instructions to get the trash out of the kitchen then help Dad with Amy and Evan. Amy is told to help Dad with Evan. Mom leaves. Noah goes to the back of the house and plays video games. Dad blinks at the trash. Amy and Evan erupted into loudness contests. Dad tries to figure out how to divide time between refereeing Amy and Evan, working on the tub, and coding web applications. It’s quiet upstairs… too quiet…
From the mouths of babes September 5, 2008 3:33 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad , add a commentDad, to the ice cream truck driver: "You’re like a cat. I feed you and you keep coming back."
Ice cream dude: *blink* *blink*
File under things not to say.
add a commentOur Life September 4, 2008 6:24 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Cathy, Daily Life, Evan, Family, Noah, Of Being Dad , 2commentsBetween coughing up my lungs today, I have been hard at programming on a project. I have some neat things happening but they never seem to happen quickly enough. I took only one break today to return something I borrowed longer than I should have. I am close on my code but it always seems like I need just another half an hour when our evening chaos erupts. This evening’s chaos was complicated by the high school parent night.
What is evening chaos? It starts when a child says he needs the mouse I stole from his computer so he can do his homework. Then Mom dashes out the door explaining the homework Amy has to do after the kids finish cleaning the kitchen table. That’s the table with 3 inches of soapy foam on it and a perplexed middle schooler asking, "uh. How do I clean that up?" Still he manages to leave the table a sticky mess. Evan, who is getting closer to being housebroken, pees on the floor in the girls room. I’m on the phone with the bank trying to get them to fax me a letter that they say they can’t mail to me for 10 days due to federal law. I need it Monday but preferably tomorrow. Dinner has to be made. Go downstairs and sharpen a pencil. Hear Amy and Evan start to fight. Cathy texts to tell me she is going to park illegally. I call to give her a hard time but get voicemail so I text her my approval and then she calls. Evan is screaming just because he has lungs that aren’t filled with gunk. Evan wants to help with Amy’s homework. Oh dinner. Noah has a question on his homework. Code? Sharpen pencil again. And… that’s just the beginning.
2commentsAnd then she cut them off… September 1, 2008 12:09 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Family , add a commentIn memory of the curls…
Update: It doesn’t look terrible to me but Mom has declared it a disaster. They’ve gone to get the hair fixed. I am sure we will have before and after pictures.
Update: Cathy has posted the before and after pictures.
add a commentFrom the mouths of babes August 27, 2008 9:59 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Love, Of Being Dad, Philosophy, Sarah , add a commentI decided to teach Amy the Daimoku today and it is wonderful to chant together with her. At bedtime, I asked her if we could do it again and she wanted to chant then read a book. We repeat the Daimoku 3 times. What does Nam-myoho-renge-kyo mean?
Nam-myoho-renge-kyo is the Buddhist prayer that means I dedicate my life to bringing out the very best in myself and in all people. [Source, Jason Jarrett of A Buddhist Podcast, A Buddhist Podcast - Bodhisattvas of the Earth, 24:17-26:12]
Dad and Amy (3 years old), repeating 3 times: "Nam Myoho Renge Kyo"
Sarah (15 years old) with shocked look on her face: "You’re brainwashing her!"
Dear Sarah:
add a commentBuddhism is about revitalizing humanity, and transforming the world we live in from one dominated by greed, anger, and stupidity into one of peace and happiness. [Source, Jason Jarrett of A Buddhist Podcast, A Buddhist Podcast - Bodhisattvas of the Earth, 2:46-2:58]
Bad Dad August 22, 2008 5:49 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Family, Of Being Dad , add a commentI have turned chores such as cleaning rooms into them against me. There is no pleasure in the task for anyone. My blood pressure soars and their tears flow. I think it is time for a new paradigm in this household. Chores will no longer we done alone. Dad will be your partner and we will have fun with the mundane.
add a commentFrom the mouths of babes August 22, 2008 3:13 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes , add a commentAmy, in a gleeful mood, describing her day at school and tapping the front left part of her head with a single finger: "____, whose participating part of his brain got damaged, really likes music."
add a commentFrom the mouths of babes August 20, 2008 7:24 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes , add a commentMom: "Evan, lay down on the couch."
Evan, 3 years old, not looking up from his toys but to brush his hair from his eyes: "Okay maaan."
Mom: " Did you just say ‘okay man’?"
Evan, not looking up from his toys: "I say okay man."
Mom, shocked: "What are you? A hippie?!"
From the mouths of babes August 16, 2008 12:54 am
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Cathy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad , add a commentAmy, 6 years old, asking Dad: "Why is your tummy so big?"
Mom: "Amy, that’s not nice."
Amy: "But it’s bigger than it used to be!"
Dad: "I’m pregnant."
Thank you Twitters! August 13, 2008 4:34 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Cathy, Daily Life, Education, Family, Health, Transportation, Travel , 2commentsWe just had an enormous scare. It was expected. Sarah entered Rocky Hill Elementary School in the third grade. On her first day home, she failed to get on her bus and we drove to the school to pick her up. On her second day home, she rode the bus but did not get off at her stop which was no problem; the bus driver drove her back to the school and we picked her up. Amy now shares a similar story.
On Monday, I picked Amy up in the carpool because we had to rush over to the Expo Center to work the School Matters booth. That confused the teachers so on Tuesday they sent her to the carpool instead of putting her on the bus so I picked her up in the office. Today was her first day riding the bus home. I could not find Cathy and assumed she was napping. Tweet! I leashed Dharma for some much needed training, donned by iPod with some Jimmy Buffett playing, and walked calmly to the bus stop where I realized my cell phone (doubles as my timepiece) was still sitting on my desk. Much to my surprise, Cathy walks up to me announcing, "that’s strike 2!" referring to my failure to respond to her text message asking about where the children get dropped off this year. The bus pulls up and 4 neighborhood children bounce out but not our Amy. In our stunned silence, the bus just starts to pull away. We were too far away to converse with the driver. I almost whistled for him but assumed Amy was in the office at the school. A moment later one of the children is explaining that Amy was on the bus! I have transportation’s number on speed dial on my cell phone but the phone is on my desk 1/4 mile away and we are on foot. Cathy calls the school as we make haste toward the house and they explain that they don’t have a way to call the driver. No worries. The bus will just take her back to the school at the end of the run.
I return to the house and decide to get back to work. Cathy is going to run around and fetch Amy, and her older sister and a friend from the high school. Everyone is calm. We part company and a few seconds later my cell rings to tell me the school called and Amy got off at Dunbarton Oaks! Tweet! That’s on the wrong side of the dangerous and busy, dreaded Northshore Drive! With Amy’s hard-headedness I could easily see her crossing Northshore. I direct Cathy, "take a right on Northshore then immediately turn left into Dunbarton Oaks." She calls back, "I’m at Kingsington." I picture her in Farragut (which she’s not) hours away from being able to reach Amy who is obviously playing Frogger on Boothillshores Drive. I race out the door and pretend like I’m still a sprinter in high school track. Tweet! It doesn’t matter if I have a heart attack as long as I reach Amy in time! I reach and cross Northshore. Cathy calls to say she has been in Dunbarton Oaks and one road closer to our neighborhood, which I’d forgotten existed, and there is no sign of Amy. Tweet! By this time, I’m at the same cross road as Cathy and I take the drivers seat in the van along with my wheezing. Tweet! Cathy gets a call to say a mother, who used to be a teacher, has Amy in her yard in Dunbarton Oaks and is waiting for us. Tweet!
Thank you to everyone who Twittered your thoughts as we lived this scare! Thanks to @Critter, @nathanblevins and here, @Digitarius, @knoxgirl75, @MariAdkins, @bobmissy07, @alanstevens, @overtlytrite, @dwneylonsr, @mwoodvols, and @areynolds65! And thanks to all others that were thinking of Amy. Hope I didn’t miss anyone. Thank you all! It would not have surprised me (nor Amy) much if someone pulled up and said, "I’m from Twitter! Stay right here your parents will be here in a moment." Of course, I hope she would not get in the car unless she knew you.
Related: I do blog the kids lives
2commentsRough start to 1st day of 5 kids 5 schools August 11, 2008 7:58 am
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Cathy, Daily Life, Education, Evan, Family, Health, Noah, Sarah, Tommy , 1 comment so farToday we sent the 1st, 7th and 10th graders to school. Evan now has his grandmother’s defunct cell phone as a toy. It still has some juice so the screen lights up and the menus work. Last night when Cathy and I came to bed the crib was doing a flashy Close Encounters number. After silencing that visual alarm I set the phone by my bed. Well, apparently my mother-in-law gets up every day at 5am. At least, that’s when her cell phone alarm went off. I wanted to rise at 6 or 6:15. Never give yourself a choice! The secret to waking is picking a specific time and sticking to it. Also don’t do the easy the numbers; nothing that would be printed on a clock face. Wake at 6:01 not 6:00. Wake at 6:14 not 6:15 etc. I did wake at 6:00 without an alarm. And again at 6:07 when I stirred Cathy and decided today would be 6:15. I totally forgot the french toast and bacon I had wanted to prepare for their first day of school. At 6:54 Cathy kicked me out of bed and cursed me. We rushed Amy to readiness and at the last minute she decides on says she needs the restroom but could hold it until school. No way! We give her the time she needs and miss the bus by seconds. As we drive up the street, the bus is starting its turn onto Northshore Drive. Amy was not phased. She is simply jolly to be going to school.
Noah headed off in time very nonchalant. And Sarah is trying to carry far too much in one trip. Wet artwork, 3 flags, courier bag, and something else I cannot remember.
Good luck children! Have fun at school and learn much.
Oh, what of Tommy and Evan? They don’t start quite yet but to prepare Tommy for rising so early, he has to get himself up by 7am and be bathed and dressed else he loses computer privileges for the day. This morning he woke at 7am but his sister occupied the bathroom so he took advantage of the moment to sleep in his chair. Perhaps his time sound be earlier!
Update: Cathy points out that today went rather swimmingly despite the missed bus and I agree. "Rough" is relative.
1 comment so farFrom the mouths of babes August 7, 2008 7:55 pm
Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes , add a commentAmy’s friend:"I want to play the step mom."
Amy’s friend:"And she better be pretty!"
