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"Murphy was an optimist!"

From the mouths of babes January 17, 2015 9:18 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Cathy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes
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Cathy: "You are returning that funeral home questionnaire!?"

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Protected: Early Mornings December 11, 2014 5:47 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Noah, Of Being Dad
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Guess what I did on the way to work! December 4, 2014 8:58 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad, Travel
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I knew things were about to get messy so I put on some rubber gloves. I worked it by myself but was getting nowhere then a female sales associate joined me. The two of us grunted, writhed, and struggled but could not get it in despite having used excessive lubricant on the rubber. The tip got messy and we had to stop to clean it. Then it occurred to me to put some lubricant on my finger, insert it in the opening, and rub it around the inside edges. After that it slipped in with ease and I explained, "It just wasn’t enough lube. You had to use more lube." I gave it three screws and was finished. Btw, the headlight on the van is working now.

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From the mouths of babes December 2, 2014 7:55 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Cathy, Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes
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Cathy: "Evan, do you have any self control?!"
Evan, 9: "No but…"

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From the mouths of babes November 28, 2014 7:31 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Cathy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes
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Cathy: "I’m getting in the shower to shave my head."
Cathy: *glowers*
Cathy: "This is why you don’t talk to me before I’ve had my coffee."

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From the mouths of babes November 28, 2014 7:28 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Cathy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Tommy
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Cathy: "Why are you laying on the floor?"
Tommy: "Because it annoys Dad."

At least he is honest.

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From the mouths of babes November 17, 2014 6:52 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
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Evan, 9: "Why do we have a weeping angel [on our bookshelf]?"
Me, with intensity: "Don’t look away!"
Evan: *Looks at me* *pauses* *smacks hand to face* "Oh, I would have been sooo dead!"

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From the mouths of jobs September 28, 2014 3:20 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
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Evan, bemoaning tomorrow being a school day.
Dad: "I’ll switch with you. You go to work for me and I’ll go to school for you."
Evan: "Ok. I’ll go and ask them to fire me. Then I’ll get a fun job like Chuck E Cheese or Sonic!"

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From the mouths of babes September 11, 2014 7:01 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
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Evan singing “la la laaa la”
Me: how do you know that song?
Evan: “Wreck it Ralph” “Help! I need somebody. Help.”
Me: “is that from Wreck It Ralph too?”
Evan: “No, Dad. That’s the Beatles!”

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From the mouths of babes August 30, 2014 9:08 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
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Evan, 9 years old: “I like being high!” “Everything looks different when you are high. It’s so beautiful.” “Being high is awesome!”

We were driving the rental truck home.

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From the mouths of babes May 16, 2014 7:22 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Dharma, Family, From the mouths of babes, Molly, Pets, Tommy
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Last night I asked my son if the dogs had enough food for this morning. This word "yes" I do not think it means what he thinks it means.

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My submission for Dad of the Year May 14, 2014 7:41 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Evan, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
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"Stop fighting, Goddammit!"

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From the mouths of babes March 31, 2014 5:21 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, From the mouths of babes
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Nice Vietnamese woman cutting my hair: "Yes, we have to cut more off as we get older to make the gray go away."

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Cringeworthy moment March 14, 2014 10:44 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes, Of Being Dad
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Cringeworthy moment: Hearing your small child say, "I like your youtube video where you blah blah blah and blah blah and my favorite, chutney!" Do you remember when only adults were on the Internet? My videos do!

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From the mouths of babes February 5, 2014 7:32 am

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Daily Life, Family, From the mouths of babes
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Words I actually hear slip from my lips: "We should get together and flapjaw sometime."

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