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From the mouths of babes

We asked the 10.5 year old to watch something other than Futurama or Simpsons. He begins his breakdown as I try to find Animaniacs or Pinky and the Brain.

Me: "Do you want to play some cards with me?"
Evan: "No"
Me: "Do you want to play a board game with me?"
Evan: "No"
Me: "Do you want to be in the same room with me?"
Evan: "I’m going to go take a bath."

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Guess what I did on the way to work!

I knew things were about to get messy so I put on some rubber gloves. I worked it by myself but was getting nowhere then a female sales associate joined me. The two of us grunted, writhed, and struggled but could not get it in despite having used excessive lubricant on the rubber. The tip got messy and we had to stop to clean it. Then it occurred to me to put some lubricant on my finger, insert it in the opening, and rub it around the inside edges. After that it slipped in with ease and I explained, "It just wasn’t enough lube. You had to use more lube." I gave it three screws and was finished. Btw, the headlight on the van is working now.