Tonight is so beautiful
The fog is thick
And the air absolutely still
Only a car or two can be heard
in the distance
No planes fly tonight
Few lights pollute the darkness
The crickets are silent
The possum and raccoon have stayed home
A hoot owl speaks twice then says no more
My puppy sits faithfully with me
She too is still like the air
The air is crisp like a walk-in freezer
at the grocery
But not cold
I could sleep on this log tonight
There is magic in the air
I have found calm and peace
After having a child yell at me
For three hours
Oh It’s like a game.
The Teachers try to teach
the meaning behind Arthur’s play
But it is cruel.
The Teachers know the rules.
We cannot be told until after school
But when the final bell has rung
We are gone and a new class has begun
That cannot be told until after school.
So while in class we ponder the moral behind Arthur’s play
So we can make our report and make an A.
Then after school has come
And we are eager to get out and have our fun.
But no one is there to remind us that Arthur’s play has begun.
We get out and make our calls to impress the Boss
And all the while Cliff’s notes sit at home.
Why do we not remember the moral of the play
from day to day after school?
Then sometime when it is far too late
Perhaps sitting in a bar being contemplative
We will think of Arthur’s play
And recognize our after school fate.
Arthur tried to teach us early
That we are all destined to play a role.
And we shall all be Willy in his Play.
The video (4MB 1:14) is just me reading the following which in essence is just a list of words so you may just want to save your bandwidth. I suggest that you read column one first, then column two, then left to right all the way down. In the video it sounds like I wrote this in 1988 but it was actually 1998.
Current State of Me (aka A Single Moment)
Normally I like to leave interpretation of any written piece to the reader, however, I think this probably stands to have some explanation otherwise I could just randomly pick words from a dictionary and call it art. Hmm.. Now that’s not a terrible thought!
The following are straight from the journal (6 years ago) with the exception of one that required edits (it’s a journal!) and the notes of course are from the present.
- Writing Things
- The "things" I was writing were my journal entry and the poem itself
- Thinking Change
- The thinking "change" was all that had gone on in my recent past from marriage to getting laid off to starting my own business.
- Dreaming Deranged
- These were thoughts of an alternative path that I could have walked with no debt and unrealistic fantasy dreams. Regret of choices made, desires to change them and imagining how different things would be. Demented thoughts.
- Blinking Dazed
- The dreaming-deranged overwhelmed me and I spaced out for a few. It felt great to momentarily be nowhere!
- Pondering Amazed
- The stepping back into reality after resetting my fuse and realizing the significance of many of the choices I’d made in that recent (and far) past.
- Wondering Craze
- The struggling I did with myself over whether or not I’d made good choices
- Wandering Maze
- I would get lost in my own thoughts and sometimes could not escape myself. It would be like the walls closing in.
- Listening Beat
- I simply took a second to enjoy the music Border’s was playing
- Hoping Reach
- My mind wanted someone to help me
- Praying Seek
- Expanding on the former..a more spiritual cry for help.
- Delaying Weak
- Recognition that I create my own Hell through procrastination, my biggest weakness.
- Straying Lazy
- My inclination (at the time) to give up
- Crazy? Crazy!
- Am I losing it? Through my own actions – yes.