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"Murphy was an optimist!"

Weekend Project – Day 25 December 30, 2010 3:18 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Amy, Birthday, Daily Life, Family, Holiday, House, Of Being Dad
, 1 comment so far

I had hoped to have the clubhouse finished by Christmas. We are so close! I have a new obstacle; One of the dogs has taken to chewing the extension cords. I lost a 100′ extension cord that had served me well for 20 years. And yesterday, I lost a 50′ extension cord that I had used once. Looks like I’m going to a totally 18v rechargeable workshop.

We are now officially done with step 16 of 27. Count Amy’s wardrobe changes.

Weekend Project - Day 25Weekend Project - Day 25

And a brief night time attempt that failed to accomplish anything.

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Morning Sex Is Like Russian Roulette October 14, 2007 9:18 pm

Posted by Doug McCaughan in : Sex, Touchy Subjects
, 6comments

Warning! Turn your virgin eyes away! The following allegory alludes to one of the three taboo subjects which should never be discussed outside the walls of your own home. I happen to be typing this from within the confirms of those walls so its kind of okay. Today’s taboo subject is sex! As for the other taboo subjects, I posted about drugs on Friday and post about politics far too much.

What guy doesn’t dream of his daily alarm clock being a beautiful nymphomaniac using the bed as a trampoline while yelling "ride ’em cowgirl!"? Guys in late high school and throughout their college years love to joke about their morning wood. But these young turks are single and naive for it is not morning "wood." The term is "morning would." Because you would if you could but you can’t because if you try you die. It’s similar to the praying mantis

"Placing them in the same jar, the male, in alarm, endeavoured to escape. In a few minutes the female succeeded in grasping him. She first bit off his front tarsus, and consumed the tibia and femur. Next she gnawed out his left eye…it seems to be only by accident that a male ever escapes alive from the embraces of his partner" Leland Ossian Howard, Science, 1886. [Source, The Female Praying Mantis: Sexual Predator or Misunderstood by Michele Doughty See also, You Give Love A Bad Name]

Or perhaps the spider.

in over 60% of cases the female then eats the male. [Source]

So in the morning when you arise, just observe your wife in her restful bliss, put the gun down, and go, uh, read the newspaper.

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