Day: January 13, 2009

Posted on by — 1 Comment

My day in court

Tomorrow I get to spend the day in Civil Sessions Court. Just a little bit of my past coming back to haunt me. So today I thought I’d call down to find out the procedure. It went something like this:

Me: I am calling to find out what I need to bring to court tomorrow.
Them: I’m sorry sir that would be giving legal advise.
Me: Okay. How long will this take?
Them: I don’t know how many people are on the docket.
Me: How long does it normally take?
Them: Can’t say.
Me: Since I have never done this, can you explain the procedure to me?
Them: No that would be giving legal advice.
Me: You mean to tell me the process, the way your court works, is legal advice?
Them: I cannot give you legal advice. You need to consult a lawyer.
Me: I cannot afford a lawyer. Can you provide one for me?
Them: We don’t do that.
Me: Do you have a webpage that explains what I can expect in court tomorrow?
Them: I’m sorry sir. We cannot give legal advice.
Me: Feeling a little crotchety today aren’t we?
Them: *Click*

Yea! Tax dollars at work. Guess I should have gone to law school. I’ll just channel Alan Shore tomorrow and hopefully not learn what a holding cell feels like.

Posted on by — 2 Comments

For the record…

If you decide to use the cleaning feature on your oven, and there is a fish stick left in the oven, the fish stick will burst into flame. The oven door will be locked because that’s what the cleaning function does. Since the oven gets so hot during the cleaning process, it locks tight and won’t open until the inside cools even if you abort the cleaning process. So you stand by helplessly holding a useless fire extinguisher watching through the oven window as the 15 centimeter tall flame burns bigger and brighter and the over continues to report "cooling" and your mind starts calculating the cost of replacing the stove.

Lesson: Pre-clean the oven before using the cleaning feature of the oven.

English to metric conversion by OnlineConversion.com.

Posted on by — Leave a comment

Programming Error of the Day – Global Search and Replace

I had a very unique string to replace throughout my application. Simple enough, instead of being text, it should be an image. I had the image code already written for a different image so I copied it, then went to search and replace the string but forgot to change the name of the image. I originally had 13 replacements across several files. Now I have to manually inspect 32 lines of code to make 13 corrections.

Remember, automated tools are a great way to make mistakes faster. And no, this has nothing to do with Sh*t Creek. That boat is totally about a Thursday deadline and a much needed miracle.