Take two and a half minutes of your life and experience ten minutes of shopping at Border’s with Evan!
Category: Family
Happenings in a 5 child, 2 adult household.
From the mouths of babes
Evan reminds me of Max (btw, that link autoplays a Max and Ruby snippet and Evan bee lined it to my lap so we had to watch all of them as he identified characters and objects in the movie. What fun!)
Dad: "What do you want for breakfast?"
Evan bolts over to the food shelf and points at Cinnamon Toast Crunch: "ONE!"
Dad says NO…so what
We are dog sitting this weekend. No, let’s call it like it is. We traded 3 children for one Corgi. Granted, I think the children are more well behaved. This is still a welcomed change of pace for the holiday weekend.
We wake this morning and Crystal has mined the floor so I put Evan on the indoor slide and he watches from the safety of the loft as I clean. Crystal has a special diet so I lock her in Tommy’s room then feed Molly in the kitchen. This is my first moment to use the restroom. Yes, I leave the door open because I have to keep an eye on the pixie and you know the modeling thing.
Here’s a thought for you non-parents. How does toilet training begin? This will make your head reel. The word is modeling. Let me tell you! A dog growling at you during a special moment is nothing as disturbing as a toddler handing you toilet paper! [Source]
I see Evan place his hand on the doorknob to Tommy’s room. "No!" Evil grin. I repeat "No" and even get intellectual offering him an explanation. Click. Squeak. Slam! Ok. The door definitely opened while I looked down. Perhaps he peeked and closed it before Crystal escaped. Then I hear the jingling of her collar against Molly’s metal food bowl.
Does anyone listen to Dad’s lectures of no? The 14 year old went to her first after high school football party then spent the night at a friend’s house. Talk about nerve wrecking for Dad! Please think about Dad saying, "No!"
More On The Differences Between Men and Women
Men and women see the world differently. Noah has school pictures today.
Cathy: "How did Noah look this morning?"
Me: "I’m pretty sure he went to school."
Cathy: "How did Noah look this morning?"
Me: "I emphasized to him that he really needed to turn in his check for pictures."
Cathy: "How did Noah look this morning?"
Me: "Umm. I know he was wearing clothes."
Cathy: "How did Noah look this morning?"
Me: "I don’t know. Give me a hint!"
Update: Apparently Amy had school pictures yesterday too. Mom is less than thrilled.
I’ve got a butt!
Uncle Jim has a great song that the children love (and I do too!) called "I’ve Got a Butt" on his Let There Be Fun CD. Go listen to track 8. Hit the XMKids request line at XMFan to get the full song played.
Jim Mayer, aka Uncle Jim, is an award-winning children’s music performer who has been playing children’s music since 2002. The term “Uncle Jim” is not a figurative one; Jim has twenty nieces and nephews and he knows what kids like! [Source]
He’s a Tennessean! Living in Nashville. Now which child needs to join the fanclub?
Lull Them to Sleep
Evan’s crib lives in our bedroom. It has a nook. So that Cathy and I could watch television we would leave it on when Evan was put in the crib for the night. This way he wouldn’t go from a total black, quiet room to a bright, noisy lighted room. When I noticed him watching the television after I would put him in the crib, and I noted that the programs were sometimes violent, or Ophraish, or foul mouthed comedians, I started to question my parenting.
Having Comcast’s digital cable, I started setting the television to classical music. Of course, Cathy will put the music on the 70s channel when she puts Evan down for naps or sleep. Between the two of us, he’s now being flooded with music that encourages big hair, high libido, and a serious coke habit (have you ever actually watched Fantasia?).
It didn’t occur to me that we had ingrained a ritual into the poor boy’s head until the cable went out today. Evan went down for a nap and complained that the tv was "broke" and demanded his music. What? Use a boom box or radio?! Pshaw!
Dear Sarah
Thank you for saving my butt today. No child should have to go to school after having Dad do her hair. Amy owes you a big one!
Happy Anniversary Cathy!
Cathy and I dated for a year and a half and then were married on August 25, 2001. Our story is published along with more details of our meeting. Cathy makes me very happy! I cannot believe that it has only been 6 years that we have been married. I feel like we have been together our whole lives! My Busy Body Book warned me of our anniversary yet I failed to shower her in gifts. So tonight, I am painting the bedroom! (no, that’s not a euphemism!)
Cathy I love you!
- 2006 anniversary
- 2005 anniversary
- 2004 anniversary
- 2003 (started blogging in ‘04)
- 2002 (started blogging in ‘04)
The Boy Scouts tried to kill me today
I was debating not going on next month’s boyscout outing. I enjoy the outings very much! But they can be expensive and money is heavy on my mind right now. I came to my senses and decided not to deny the boys. As a matter of fact, I’ve offered to include Sarah in the weekend’s activities. So next month, Tommy, Noah, Sarah and I will go to Camp Pellissippi for a canoe derby. We will have canoe racing and see how many people we can fit into a single boat and so forth. It should be much fun.
Scouting is very safety conscious. To do activities like this in scouting requires a medical form stating one is in good health. Water activities require a swim test within the past 6 months. My test was this morning. Just before I got in the water I slammed down my last swig of coffee. I had to do 6 laps with power strokes and then 2 laps with a resting backstroke. I was doing fine and had the lungs and strength to do a lap without even raising my head although my 2nd and 3rd lap included taking breaths just to not wear myself out. At the end of my 3rd lap, it hit me! A feeling like indigestion! I couldn’t get a full lung of air! What I wanted to do more than anything in the world was a world class belch! Have you ever had one of those? Maybe you just chugged a carbonated beverage and then you feel the need to burp but its stuck in your chest just below your sternum? If you can only work it out, the reverberating bass tones emanating from your mouth surely would shake walls and register on the Richter scale. Those last 3 laps were horrible. I wanted to be polite and not burp but I wanted to be able to get some air and not look like I was struggling to do a simple swim. What a terribly uncomfortable feeling!
I passed. I blame the coffee for the tough moment!
From the mouths of babes
Dad: "What do you want for dinner?"
Noah: "Steak"
Tommy: "Meat"
Mom: "Whatever you want dear"
Sarah: "Mac and cheese"
Amy: "Not steak"
Evan: "Da da!"
We had pizza.
Rough day for the bus
Tommy is a senior this year. His whole school career he has either been driven to school or ridden "the short bus." A special needs bus with 7 to 13 students with a variety of handicaps and disabilities (along with no trained aid – soapbox issue) is far different from a full size bus with..oh, 40 to 60 students. Tommy is riding the regular bus for the first time in his life. So far it has been a good experience. This morning however, he miss his bus by 30 seconds. Ran up the street just in time to see it pulling away. That had to be frustrating to a person who is used to a bus pulling up in front of his house and honking the horn then patiently waiting while he rose from bed, dressed himself, grabbed a Poptart, and leisurely hobbled to the bus.
This day continues to be hard for Tommy bus-wise. Apparently a student got on the bus without a note authorizing that student to get be on that bus. The bus is returning to the school and a small riot is occurring on the bus. An irate Tommy called to complain to me. Obviously, he had joined in with the other students to raise voice and gripe. I think I talked him down from such a mistake. This is a difficult situation for an Aspie.
Such an inappropriate dad
Tommy missed his bus this morning so I had to drive him in. On the way to school I asked him about his camping trip this past weekend and how he was feeling. Now I like esoteric humor and double entendre and often for my own entertainment include references in my conversations that simply are missed or go over people’s heads without changing the flow or meaning of our discussion. I entertain myself this way. I asked Tommy if he used the latrine in the woods then to be clear I added, "Did you shit in the woods?" I was making a reference to this book
Poof I’m a taxi
First missed school bus of the year. Perhaps he’ll take a lesson from this.
Dear Sarah
I know you are a flighty teenager with boys on your mind and you know everything. Yes, parents are stupid. It is a miracle that we were able to figure out how to put tab A into slot B and produce a child whose intelligence far exceeds our own. I understand that we, as parents, somehow managed to live a very sheltered life and that in your mere 14 years you have accumulated far more life experiences and wisdom than we could ever hope for ourselves. Of course, we also went straight from our own mothers’ birth canals to adulthood so we in no way can relate to your teenage predilections (look it up). Now, I know it is a condition of our own ignorance that we lay such importance on silly, mundane things like putting clothes in the laundry instead of leaving them on the floor. Being organized helps our simple minds which is why we ride you so to live a clutter free and structured life. Do it for us! I can overlook the laziness of the clothing; however, please be sure to unplug your hair straightener. Being a dumb adult, I might grab the wrong end and burn myself. More importantly, being a toddler, with a decade left before he knows everything, Evan might burn himself. Oh, and since you already know everything and one day will be living on your own, certainly you can appreciate the fire hazard this tool presents. Wuv ya!
Back in Business!
Last night while I was putting my machines back in place from our temporary exile to Holiday Inn Express (no, I don’t feel smarter), I awkwardly squeezed under my desk with my chest across the case of my primary development machine, one hand on the front corner, and one hand on the back corner when a strong tingling sensation raged through my body. I said a wordy dird. Cathy responded kindly, "Are you ok?" To which I honestly answered, "No, I’m being electrocuted." She suggested, "you should get up." I explained, "I can’t." And she left the room. Leaving me to die…die! DIE!
And yes, I found the short and have since gotten my development box and servers working. My clients will be happy to know productivity is back!
