Oh shit, Monday again.
Category: Daily Life
Ramblings, often stream of conscious, journaling the events of my life.
Either genius or stupid
Depending on your perspective, this is either a genius or not very brilliant solution to a cat problem. The kittens have taken to chewing electrical cords. At $80 a cord, Apple is loving our kittens. So, I’ve decided to train them away from cords…by squirting them with water when I see them chewing a cord. I think it is a spark of genius! One way or another, this problem will end.
Parenting with a squirt gun
I don’t hit my children but I do yell far too much. I’ve decided to quit yelling. Instead I’m going to carry a squirt bottle with me everywhere I go. If my children appear damp, don’t jump to concluding they got caught in a squall, but know their behavior has been corrected.
Mondays
It’s what Xanax was invented for. [sic]
Deadlines and tech support
So I have deadlines? Naturally that means I will have hardware and network issues.
From the mouths of babes
My oldest son: "Can I test the spray paint here?"
Me: "You are standing too close to the house and our grill and other stuff that the wind could carry the overspray of the paint onto and cause your death. And I really don’t want to go to jail for the rest of my life."
Because I ripped my pants!
Hahahahaha
Panic
Nothing quite compares to waking up in a total panic attack.
I am very excited about this movie!
State of Me
I am tired. And I acknowledge that dimly is no excuse.
Failing at life
Since leaving the basement in 2010 to work in Cubeville, I believe my biggest failing in life has been to not find my "Cheers" in which to get schnookered for the transition from work to home and vice versa.
Musical Boobies!
When my wife walked through the room with music projecting from her chest, I knew she had an iPhone tucked in her bra, but I couldn’t resist declaring, "Musical boobies!" and hugging her with my ear pressed to one.
Of course, she grinned and replied, "I knew you were going to say that." Then, when I attempted to dial in a different station and turn up the volume, she frowned.
Morons
Deep thoughts
If your sole goal has become “just make it to the end” perhaps the time has come to rethink your life’s purpose.
Nice guys do finish last
There’s a reason nice guys finish last and I think it’s time to move ahead of the pack.
