Think deep.
I woke up early in the morning ready to get up and program while everyone slept but I could not move. I was lying on my right side in the shape of a C. The dog lay on feet. Evan was leaning against my back. And in the C the cat was curled up against my stomach and purring.
Sometimes, the signs are telling you to keep sleeping.
Student: I have needs!
Master: You have commitments!
AT is a riot! His Bonnaroo posts (and Rich’s) made me long for some live music.
Man, you people. I got sick of twitter before any of you started with it! [Source]
Student: I live in Catch-22.
Master: Perhaps you should try non-fiction.
Student: I keep making mistakes.
Master: Have you tried doing something different?
Student: I have failed my family.
Master: Are you going to quit?
…And guys like sexy women. So what do get when you combine the two? A Holly Valarse remix that’s a gas!
This made me laugh so hard today! I have watched it over and over and over. Tommy Chong! You’re my hero!
Jazz from Hell has some additional words and the original MSNBC interview with Contessa Brewer regarding Paris Hilton to put this in perspective.
Update: For those who have’t watched the original MSNBC interview, Colbert’s very direct question to Chong is mocking Brewer.
Who have I wronged so badly?!
Student: What have I become?
Master: The sum of all your experiences.
Well, this about describes me (via Jon). And Les just nailed it! (a must read!)
Btw, with apologies to The Blogfather, I despise HEH. It has bothered me since the first time I ever saw it used in a chatroom (which was probably IRC circa 1988). Dictionary.com gives it a definition of "a half laugh" but I have always read HEH as bemusement but almost a disrespectful, laugh of obligation like "ok, you made the effort to say it so I’ll make an effort to acknowledge you." The two links above deserve much more than a HEH!
That’s right! I don’t want to work anymore. I just want to blog! That means my readers, all five of you, must each click my ad links about 1000 per day. Do that and I’ll be fine. Now hop to it!
Student: Can’t.
Master: Will.
Last night Jon Stewart brought it home. He nailed it for me last night. I laughed until I cried. It was so subtle. Did you catch it?
Paul Rudd, "I have a feeling that in the entire history of Comedy Central I’m the first person that’s ever said ‘pump out a Rene Auberjonois‘"
Jon Stewart, "There’s actually uh Carlos Mencia does it as a recurring bit."
Paul Rudd, "I knew I’d heard it before!"
So why’s it so funny? Read this exceptional article, Take the Funny and Run in full to really understand the joke. For those that don’t want to click over, here’s the brief:
Rogan, who refers to Mencia as "Carlos Menstealia," claims it’s common knowledge among his fellow funny men that Mencia takes bits from other comics and performs them as his own. [Source]
Anyone who has ever performed stand-up is familiar with the red light, the universal signal that warns dawdlers it’s time to wrap things up. In the ’80s, comics at the Hollywood Improv came up with a novel use for the light. When shining steadily, it had the conventional meaning. But if the bulb began sputtering, it was the comedic equivalent of an air-raid siren, warning performers to lock up their original material immediately unless they wanted to lose it to a master thief.
Robin Williams, comedy’s most notorious joke rustler, was in the house.
…the famed Comedy Store in Los Angeles has even instituted a Mencia early-detection signal similar to the Improv’s for Williams, though considerably less high-tech. "Every time he walks in, the guys in the cover booth just start yelling ‘Mencia’s here!’"
[Source]