I placed the ladder from the 2nd floor to a ledge above the downstairs landing effectively giving the staircase a ceiling with a narrow opening for travel from downstairs to upstairs.
What I said, "Watch out for your head!"
What I heard: *bonk!*
That’ll be one more trip to Godiva today.
One of the challenging things about marriage is relationship management. In the corporate world, we go to training classes, seminars, mentoring, internal training, and read books on how to get along. In marriage, we wing it. In work, you leave the people you "relate" to at the door at 5pm. In marriage, you are glued to each other non-stop. People are creatures of habit and routine. We come to expect a person to be a particular way with a particular attitude. Vacations wreck havoc on routines, bring a new set of stresses and the unknown. Our attitudes and moods change with a vacation.
This morning I felt rested and relaxed. Evan rose at 6:30am and asked that I rise with him. I thought I’d be nice and let everyone else sleep in. Evan and I enjoyed some time together watching cartoons, playing with toys, and eating breakfast. I was happy. So I thought. When Cathy rose, I noted to myself that she was grouchy but I said nothing figuring that her morning caffeine was not working yet. Then came a moment where she complained about how I was relaxed then became terse and crabby when Evan got up. So who is right? Which one of us is the morning grouch? Doesn’t matter. Once someone declares me grouchy or crabby I turn into an ugly person. My mind decides, "Why try to be nice if when you are trying its not working?" Karma gets me back though. In my exasperation, I went to the porch to get some air and the door sprung back in my face spilling coffee on my most comfortable shorts.
Were either of us crabby? Probably not. We were probably working two different agendas and our moods are different than the usual. Subconsciously we probably assessed the other as off and because the other wasn’t working the same unspoken plan, labeled them crabby.
It’s a beautiful day today. I think I’ll spend it on the computer.
Dad: "Amy, I like your ankle bracelet."
Amy, 5.5 years old: "It’s not really for your ankle, but I want to be like my sister."
I want to be building forts, playing games, and laughing with the children today. My brain isn’t working at full capacity today. But I remain focused on my work because before I can play with my children, I must provide for them.
Parents are obliged to provide food, shelter, clothing, medical care, education, and spiritual development for their children. Theoretically, each of those should have equal importance. In reality, they have to be prioritized based on the situation at the time. Single parents amaze me. I do not know I would manage a family without Cathy! That is not entirely true. If I were a single parent, I would build a support system around myself of friends, family and services. As a matter of fact, we have such a support system already. I imagine that as a single parent I would have to use that support system a little heavier.
It is difficult to meet any of those obligations without money. Unfortunately, the amount of money you make/have is rather proportional to the quality of care you can provide your children. That is not to imply that a poor person is a bad parent or cannot give their child a quality education; however, a greater amount of money makes it easier to provide quality services. For instance, food choices are often governed by making ends meet. The quality of services you receive at the doctor’s office can be determined by your insurance carrier. I have observed people on TennCare having longer waits than people on private insurance. Those on TennCare may get interns while those with private insurance get the nurses and doctors. Money definitely impacts the quality of shelter which can be provided. Quality clothing can be had from consignment stores, hand me downs, and sales; however, money may determine how often clothing is purchased. Even spiritual development can be impaired by money problems since time to give spiritual guidance has to be allocated to earning money.
Whoops. This post was supposed to be about how much I love my children. Didn’t mean to slip into "I want to see poverty abolished" (even if I do).