"Family" is Latin for "never enough bathrooms."
Category: Daily Life
Ramblings, often stream of conscious, journaling the events of my life.
Back on the health kick
Today I took time to eat breakfast despite the overwhelming desire to rush out the door and just grab some food on the way. I also took time to make my lunch. While this encourages me eating at my desk, it is healthier, mentally more relaxing than fighting traffic and deciding where to eat, and saves money. Hopefully I can make this a trend.
Update: In a moment of weakness, I got some junk food. I opened the package and immediately thought, "that smells disgusting…let’s put it in my mouth." Then I threw it away.
On parenting
If you are not a parent, you probably have never said, "I’m going to kill a child!" If you are a parent, you say this with regularity.
Well
Fug me.
Just say yes
The morning thus far
Cleaned dog poo from the living room floor.
Unclogged bathroom drain.
The last year of single digits in our house!
Nine years ago, I held a blank journal in my hands and promised the gooey alien freshly spat from wife’s vagina that I would write a letter to him every day. Today the alien can read but fortunately is far more interested in watching Youtube videos of people playing Minecraft narrated by fowl mouthed f-bomb dropping cynics than seeking out my digital drivel. While the dusty journal remains devoid of entries, fear not son, I have left a virtual trail of embarrassing photographs, stories and videos to provide you and your future therapist countless hours of recurring couch sessions. Happy Birthday! You mean the world to me! (and please quit cursing behind our backs)
[Dear reader, They grow up fast. Set the excuses aside and spend time with them lest you role play a Harry Chapin ballad. And the ‘cursing behind our backs’ was a joke.]
Other missing things
Both my garage door openers are awol.
Life Interrupted
Quite awhile ago, I decided that it if took me longer than 5 minutes to find a tool, I’d go buy a new one. The most frustrating part of projects at my house is finding the tools needed to do the job. I have one specific spot where my multimeter lives. If it is not in use, it is in its spot. Except now, when I need it. The manual to the Jeep and the multimeter are missing. I just spent 30 minutes looking for them. I’m certain they are together and it is my fault but this is infuriating. By the time I find them, I will have lost all energy and interest in working on the Jeep.
Pets do not make you live longer
Pets do not make you live longer. They kill your husband off earlier which gives you the illusion of living longer.
How not to start the day
My mornings should not begin with me walking around muttering to myself, "fucking cats."
The animals are driving me crazy
I awoke at 4am to get work done. It’s now 4:45am and no work is done. Why? I’m bouncing out of my chair to let the howling dog outside, one cat is trying to push my coffee off the table, another cat is shredding my leather chairs, and a third cat is wrapped around my ankles. This is why I need a home office with a door.
HVAC Maintenance
When you go to bed with the house at 82°F and awake with the house at 78°F, your air conditioner is trying to remind you that you should not have skipped the annual maintenance.
We will try to limp by until the weekend by making the house super cold in the morning and avoiding opening doors throughout the day (ha!).
Temperature conversion courtesy of http://www.onlineconversion.com/.
Feeding Frenzy
I awake at 4am and suddenly all the animals think, "Yea! New feeding time!"
Tron…now!
I’ve been watching Zero Motorcycles since 2008. I’m jonesing for EV motorcycle in a bad way and this video didn’t help diminish my desires. Matter of fact, I’m wanting one more than ever now!
