Category: Evan
From the mouths of babes
Evan (2.5 years old): "I want Ma Mum!"
Dad: "Ma Mum’s sick."
Evan: "I want hug Ma Mum me."
Proud Dad So Happy He Wet Himself
This is one of those blogging moments that most people don’t want to read but I’m posting it anyway. My boy pee’d in the toilet! And on the toilet and on the seat and the wall and the floor. Yes, he recognized he needed to go and knew what to do! Of course, aiming and control seems to be an issue. Dude has a bladder and a half too! We could be a diaper free house soon! Even the puppy seems to be getting it. We may not even need the training pads that we used with Molly.
From the mouths of babes
Evan asks: "Is there a mama?"
Dad: "Mama is asleep."
Evan furrows brow and almost growls: "Oooh Man. I want to go {grabbled}. Noah."
The interesting thing about Evan’s speech right now is that it is clear he gets his thought together but sometimes it takes a bit to get out. Noah is often "No" pause "ah"
And what a merry Christmas it was!
To all to whom I have not responded, thank you for your well wishes!
To all to whom we did not send a card, you were not forgotten! There was probably a technical reason like needed your address or my mad cow caused me to fail to get you on Cathy’s master mailing list.
Miracles and angels came through to help pull together our Christmas at the last minute. The children were well gifted and very happy with their presents. 
We had a wonderful visit from both sets of grandparents and Aunt Kelly.Cathy and I promised to be budget minded and agreed to not buy each other anything which is why we are both now the proud owners of new iPod nanos. We both cheated feeling the other was well deserving of a new toy.
Each year it seems one of the children gets a bum deal. This year it was Sarah’s turn. Both Tommy and Sarah received new office chairs for their desks from their grandparents. They were thrilled! I prompted Tommy to hold off on assembly until I could help him. Sarah did not heed my warning and broken open the package of numerous parts in the midst of our unwrapping mess and started assembling without checking the parts list nor understanding the instructions. (She’s going to drive like Cathy! "It felt correct to turn this way. NO! I didn’t take a left turn at Albuquerque this time.") We could not find the screws! 6 screws AWOL. We even pulled the trash back inside and went through every piece of wrapping and package that had been discarded. Tommy learned and quickly went over his parts list only to find a critical piece missing. We quickly discovered his critical piece was already attached to his chair. It wasn’t until a day later that Sarah and I drove to Home Depot and purchased bolts and washers that we realized her bolts were already in their respective holes. 
We figured this out because we could not get the new bolts to go into them! Doh! She also received a Nabaztag but it still isn’t working. Story to follow. which is finally working! After creating an account at Nabaztag, you can send a message to her rabbit over the Internet or with your phone and it will speak the message to Sarah. Oh, I almost forgot. When assembling the chair, Sarah dropped a heavy part on her foot breaking a toe. Poor Sarah!
The children had a fantastic Christmas and so did Cathy and I. Now back to work so I can finish paying off this one and put away for Christmas 2008!
Parenting Lesson of the Day (or Stupid Dad!)
Narration: [audio:http://realityme.net/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/parentinglessonoftheday21dec2007.mp3]
Target’s Pharmacy has this really cool medicine dispensing system called ClearRx™ created by a woman whose mother accidentally took her father’s medicine. We switched from our favored local pharmacy at CVS, where the employees were friendly and knew us by name, to Target’s pharmacy, where we are more of a number, specifically because of this product. Evan is fighting a sinus infection and was prescribed some antibiotics by the doctor. He has taken to liking them and tries to do it himself holding the syringe in his mouth but I still have to push the plunder. Now if you are a brain stud like me and decide to show your 2.5 year old child how the plunger on the syringe works, expect to be wearing the medicine!
I let Evan hold the dispenser in his right hand then showed him how to press the plunger with his left palm. His eyes widen as a gush of antibiotic rushed into his mouth. I leaned back with satisfaction as I waited for him to do it a second time completing his dosage. Trying to figure out what he just did, the syringe came out of his mouth and he stared at it not unlike the break he takes between squirts when I am dispensing it. Then I saw it! The gleam in his eyes. I watched as the upturned corners of his mouth meta morphed into a devilish grin. In slow motion I shouted, "NOOooooo!" as a fountain of pink fluid erupted into the air to the joyous cackling of a demented child with a devil on one shoulder patting his back and an angel on the other bound and gagged. A pink rain fell upon me! And, by the way, when your child does this, keep your mouth closed unless you want the chalky taste of artificial strawberry burned into your taste buds for the remainder of the day. Smooth.
I think I’ll go back to trying to get the hippie in my drain to leave.
We won’t have a tree for Christmas
Someone should make rubber ornaments. Evan is going to have far too much fun smashing ornaments this year. We should be using popcorn, wooden blocks, and plastic disposable decorations.
Veterans Day parade was much fun!
Evan, Cathy, Molly and I picked up Granddaddy and the 5 of us when downtown to watch Sarah march with Bearden High School’s band’s flag team in the Veterans Day parade. We parked in the State Street garage for only a dollar and walked 2 blocks to be near the front of the parade route. The aircraft fascinated me. 
I loved the helicopters playing overhead. The vintage planes doing the missing man formation was excellent. As a matter of fact, all the military vehicles were awe inspiring. Evan waved at the tank driving down the street and the turret spun around to wave back at him! Those things move quickly!
Evan was in a foul mood to begin with and getting him to wave took some effort. The nice lady who got near him and showered him with candy helped a lot. After the attack of the "cannie!" he was much chipper and social. About half way through the parade he started to get into the waving.
Molly was on great behavior but quivered whenever a noisy vehicle or drum section of a band walked by. She was on alert whenever Evan would wander too far. She has to be able to see him and much prefers to be beside him. 
She was a hit with all the police officers and many of the military. You could see them in the parade pointing to her, smiling and chatting amongst themselves. She eventually relaxed enough that I didn’t even have to hold her leash.
I was disappointed in the attendance at the parade. More people should take time to let this parade be their lunch break or to bring their families out. The weather was perfect. The patriotism high! Mardi Gras spoiled me for parades and I never thought I would enjoy this kind of parade again. I was wrong. This parade left me feeling very good!
Btw, Barney Fife was there! He’s great! Don Knots would be proud.
Oh Deer!
Cathy and I don’t get much adult social time. Between work and the children, we live fairly sequestered. Last night we took a break to have a social gathering with our friends that helped School Matters come be. The home of our host was not too far from our own and was lovely! Unlike the modern bulldoze and prefab on a flat property, this house was built with the contours of the land. Aside from visiting and conversing with adults, the best part was as we unloaded Amy and Evan from the van, two doe passed not 20 meters away from us!
I was in the building with the Shrine Circus!
Narration: [audio:http://realityme.net/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/shrinecircus.mp3]
Cathy with Amy and Evan, her parents, her sister-in-law with her 3 children, and I went to the Shrine Circus in the newly renovated Thompson Bowling Arena. The renovation looks great! And included everything except signs for the section numbers! You have to guess where your seating is assigned. I am bothered by the gating of the stairs to the upper balcony. Honestly! What is the rationale? Is there anything wrong with wandering up the nosebleed section for a different perspective or camera angle? The renovation included cup holders! Genius! But the seats seem closer to the ones in front of them; I think maybe the actual cushion is larger.
We started the evening off with the children playing in the seats and kicking, hitting, putting feet on, and other wise abusing the nice gentleman in the row in front of us. 
To give him a break, we took the children down to ride the elephants which also happened to be the first time I rode an elephant. After the ride we returned to our seats to further give the nice family in front of us a thorough pounding. Obnoxiously loud toy guns that speak "Don’t move. Drop your gun. Fire fire fire." were purchased. So at the Shrine Circus, whose mission is to help the children, we have a pretend weapon that encourages blowing away an unarmed person. 
Granddaddy felt the children could use some sugar for the show so cotton candy was purchased. Of course, the nice white shirt of the guy in front of us was begging to be finger painted by a very blue, stick Evan. Got him cleaned in without any damage to the white shirt. The show begins. 
And I hold the wild child finally giving in and returning pacifier to mouth. Just to show who is in control, at one point Evan takes his "bop" (pacifier) out and tosses it into the audience hitting the child in front of me smack dab on the head and then it settles on the floor beneath the seats of the people in front of the people in front of me. We replace it with one of Amy’s few remaining ones and he spits it to the floor where it rolls down under the seats in front of us.
Evan wins! To the family in front of us, we had become the family behind us. He is too wacky to remain and I cannot stand to allow the poor family in front of us take anymore abuse. I sacrifice the first half of the show to let Evan walk around the stadium. 
Of course, he finds a friend who’s dad happens to sell toys at the circus so they have much to do. Prior to that Evan was running me all over Thompson Bowling Arena including quickly moving up and down stairs. With no section numbers listed, it did not take long to get totally turned around. We were lost but the people in front of us weren’t getting kicked.
Eventually Evan got through his zaniness and we were able to return to enjoy the 2nd half of the show. I highly recommend it…at least the 2nd half; seems I didn’t see the first half.
From the mouths of babes
Dad: "Evan are you okay?"
Evan: "Hai"
SuperDad
Tonight was the elementary school’s open house. It may have been only the kindergarten open house but the cub scout troop was meeting so there were enough cars at the school that a couple of people parked on the lower branches of some of the trees and a couple of SUVs managed to find some space on the roof. Cathy went early and helped sell year books. I caravaned the children around town as we picked up Sarah, Sarah’s friend, and Tommy from high school activities. We ended up at McDonald’s having dinner with some cub scout friends of ours. In due time, we dropped Molly and Tommy off at the house with hopes Tommy would do some chores and the rest of us deploy to the school. Look out! Chaos coming!
We had a wonderful time, saw some friends, had pleasant chats with teachers, Sarah fell chasing Evan and bled all over the new kindergarten rug, and Amy was able to show off her school. As we came to a close, I noticed the volunteer form horribly empty so I inquired and put our names down. In that time, already-over-volunteered-Cathy stared on in dread as I swiped another bit of time out of her life with a few strokes of a #2 pencil. While she was entranced with my unsanctioned scheduling, Sarah and Evan departed, followed shortly by Amy. As the ever confident Amy found herself alone in the hallway, she took it upon herself to walk out the front of the school, through the dark parking lot, and off to the playground. The parents got a frowny face tonight. Sarah and Evan took one hall of the school. Cathy raced to the gym. A couple of scout dads joined in the search with one commenting "my child is missing too…but he’s old enough to walk home!" The teacher joined the posse. Amy was found on the playground and as she was walked into the school, her name blared across the school intercom so that all visitors became away that the McCaughans lose their children.
Didn’t Noah go with us? Anyone seen Noah?
From the mouths of babes
Evan, from his crib: "I’m not going to sleep and you cannot make me. I have been studying constitutional law on the History Channel and PBS along with escape tactics used by Wonder Pets on Noggin and tactical planning on Family Guy. You cannot legally nor forcefully hold me in this cell any longer. I am two years old for God’s sake! I don’t need to NAP! Release me now or I shall POO!"
From the mouths of babes
Dad: "Evan time to take a nap!"
Evan, the littlest con artist: *cries out* then squints really hard trying to force tears
Evan of Tasmania
Take two and a half minutes of your life and experience ten minutes of shopping at Border’s with Evan!
