Evan, 3.5 years: "I want a cookie."
Dad: "Eat two more bites of meat and I will give you a cookie."
Evan: "Close your eyes and I eat my food."
Category: Family
Happenings in a 5 child, 2 adult household.
I need my batcave!
I love telecommuting! I’m a huge advocate of telecommuting. I think we will find great societal benefit to having a group paradigm shift and having at least half our workforce work from home. Imagine if suddenly companies only needed half (or less) of their existing infrastructure needs. Less electricity spent heating, cooling and lighting them. Fewer monolithic roads needed since fewer people are commuting. Who can telecommute? Accountants, lawyers, sales people, technical people, IT people, customer service, technical support, and so many more. Basically if you work from a desk, all your collaboration can be done online or in weekly onsite meetings. If you have to lay hands on materials like at an assembly line, then unfortunately that is more difficult to do remotely. Barack Obama encourages telecommuting and so does the US Patent Office. Ask your employer to let you work from home to save the environment, make you a happier more productive employee, save the company money, and spend more quality time with the family while simultaneously getting more work hours in for the boss.
Now, the downside! To be a successful telecommuter, you need a batcave; complete with a secret passage. The kids and animals cannot know about your batcave. Nor can the wife! It must be impossible to find. Now where’s my butler?!
Handyman of the Day Award – Hot Water
Old busted water heater element replaced with shiny new one. Only two floods in the process, one sliced open hand, and no electrocutions. A 48 gallon tank is too small for a 7 person household but stands a better chance with two working heating elements. (Yes, I cross posted this with Facebook.)
From the mouths of babes
Amy: "Tinker Bell is named Tinker Bell because she’s a Tinker Fairy. Leprechauns are fairies…in Ireland. They make shoes for other fairies."
From the mouths of babes
Amy, 6.5 years old: "Dad, what’s a death threat?"
Dad: "What did you just say?!"
Amy: "What’s a death threat? On the show iCarly, they talked about death threats."
Dad: "A death threat means I’m going to have to have a talk with Nickelodeon."
From the mouths of babes
Evan, 3.5 years old, comes down stairs with his picture in one hand and a Rockband drumstick in the other. He points to the picture with the drumstick and says: "We go here now."
He was pointing to the picture of the Midway Drive-in. I’d say we’ll be there for opening night as soon as drive-in season starts.
Of Grasshoppers
Student: I intervened.
Master: Did you help?
From the mouths of babes
Evan, 3.5 years old: "Zoooombie! Zooombie!" *bump* "Ow!" *thud* *knock* *thunk* "Oh ow!" *bump* *klop* "Ow!" bump! bump! bump! "oh. I oookAY!"
Evan: "I come down stairs to scare you!"
Dad: "Well you sure did that!"
That’d be Evan wrapped in toilet paper like a mummy accidentally rolling down the wooden staircase steamroller style. It was almost in slow motion. It was one of those parent moments where you are hoping the child is fine because you really want to bust out laughing.
From the mouths of babes
Every morning I do 3 sets of 25 push ups and 3 sets of 25 sit ups. I rotate so I’ll do 25 push ups, turn over, do 25 sit ups, turn over, do 25 push ups, turn over, and so forth.
Amy: "Daddy. Every time you turn over I heard this noise like a wooden spoon hitting the floor." (that would be my back popping)
Twitter Size Does(n’t) Matter
Twitter ranking and stat programs come and go. In Knoxville I’m not even on the charts but in Knoxville, TN I’m ranked #11 (falling fast! Was 5th not long ago.). It’s all non-sense. Twitter’s value has nothing to do with how large someone’s arbitrary algorithm chooses to inflate your ego. Twitter’s value comes from how you choose to use it. So why am I jealous that my wife’s e-penis is almost twice the size (26.35cm) of mine (14.32cm)?
Warning! Clicking through to e-penis is going to show a cartoonish picture of a man’s thang.
Sunday’s Interplanetary Distance
I was hoping to take the family up to play in a park in Harrogut in conjunction with dropping Tommy back at LMU for his last couple of weeks before finals. However, I think today Cathy is on Venus and I’m on Mars and there doesn’t appear to be any connecting shuttles. My be best if I stay here and clean my office or I drive Tommy back to LMU and clear my head.
Good Son-in-law and Frozen Food
Some stereotypes exist for a reason like the whole inlaw one. So to keep relations on par with the inlaws, I left frozen mice in their freezer tonight.
From the mouths of babes
Dad: "Evan, go pee."
Evan walking past Rock Band drumset stops and pushes the 1 button: "X pee."
Evan pushes the A button: "X flush."
Evan pushes the B button: "X wash hands."
I’m thinking the Nintendo Wii might need a toilet interface. And yes, I’m aware of Super Pii Pii Brothers and you bet it’s on my wish list! (for those who don’t try to purchase it or add it to an actual wish list, Think Geek premiered Super Pii Pii Brothers on April 1st.)
From the mouths of babes
Evan, pointing to the gap in his upper teeth: "Daddy, need my tooth back. Put my tooth back in my mouth."
Tuesday Traditions
I like to cook. I prefer to cook. When I cook, I can make healthy meals at less cost…except on Tuesdays. On Tuesdays Dominos runs a Two’fer special that I cannot beat. The time it saves from cooking, the cost of supplies, and the energy saved is well worth the cost of the pizza. But better is the tradition! On Tuesdays the children know Tis The Traditional Two’fer Tasty pizza day! Got tradition?
