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Driving Patterns – Let the Ass Merge

Slow merge

fast merge

Narration: [audio:http://realityme.net/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/drivingpatternslettheassmerge.mp3]

We all know the guy. You are stuck in a slowdown usually for no reason other than rubber necking. Sometimes traffic just slows for no apparent reason at all. Maybe there was a sign encouraging people to merge right or left. You want to be doing 113 km/h but you are stuck at 32 km/h. To make the situation more frustrating you catch a glimpse in your mirrors of car speeding past all the nearly parked cars in hopes that it can merge in ahead of some poor sap. You curse, "why can’t he just get in line like the rest of us!" Then you decide to do your part for society. You will bring justice by moving your car so close to the car in front of you that he can’t possibly merge between you two. If only all the other cars would do the same! We could leave this self-important jackass parked while a solid line of cars cheerfully passes leaving him further behind than ahead. Of course, that never really happens. Some weak person 4 cars ahead of you lets him in. Where’s the vindication?!

William Beaty helped me realize that I am the problem, not the other guy. In his essay, Traffic "Experiments" and a Cure for Waves & Jams he suggests a simple cure to the merging-lane traffic jam I just described. Let them in! I have started doing this and even if 3 cars (or more) merge in front of me it has little to no impact on my arrival time at my destination. It does feel good to have not fought someone (positive karma). I have put my family at less risk by not tailgating another driver or inciting road rage in the merging driver.

Drive by looking down the road. We should be doing that anyway. When you see a slowdown, not when you start experiencing it (although it is never too late), create a gap in traffic between you and the car in front of you. If a car merges into that gap, recreate the gap. It works! It feels good! Traffic moves better. And you have been a safer driver.

Note: Conversions to metric courtesy of http://www.onlineconversion.com/. Images borrowed from Bill Beaty.

Update 7/24/2014: And 7 years later, this hits the news: http://arstechnica.com/cars/2014/07/the-beauty-of-zipper-merging-or-why-you-should-drive-ruder/

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From the mouths of babes

Amy: "nine twenty eight"
Dad: "Are you going to be our clock today?"
Amy: "Yes. nine twenty nine"
Amy: "There are three number in that itty bitty space."
Amy: "nine thirty zero. Actually nine thirty."
Amy: "It’s nine thirty one."
Amy: "It’s nine thiiirrtty twoooooo. It’s not to early to play with A and W. After nine thirty two it’s nine thirty three then nine thirty four then nine thirty five."
Amy: "It’s nine thirty three!"

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I was in the building with the Shrine Circus!

Narration: [audio:http://realityme.net/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/shrinecircus.mp3]

Cathy with Amy and Evan, her parents, her sister-in-law with her 3 children, and I went to the Shrine Circus in the newly renovated Thompson Bowling Arena. The renovation looks great! And included everything except signs for the section numbers! You have to guess where your seating is assigned. I am bothered by the gating of the stairs to the upper balcony. Honestly! What is the rationale? Is there anything wrong with wandering up the nosebleed section for a different perspective or camera angle? The renovation included cup holders! Genius! But the seats seem closer to the ones in front of them; I think maybe the actual cushion is larger.

We started the evening off with the children playing in the seats and kicking, hitting, putting feet on, and other wise abusing the nice gentleman in the row in front of us. Amy, Abby, Gave, Evan, and Doug ride an elephant at the Shrine CircusTo give him a break, we took the children down to ride the elephants which also happened to be the first time I rode an elephant. After the ride we returned to our seats to further give the nice family in front of us a thorough pounding. Obnoxiously loud toy guns that speak "Don’t move. Drop your gun. Fire fire fire." were purchased. So at the Shrine Circus, whose mission is to help the children, we have a pretend weapon that encourages blowing away an unarmed person. Evan devours cotton candy Evan devours cotton candy Granddaddy felt the children could use some sugar for the show so cotton candy was purchased. Of course, the nice white shirt of the guy in front of us was begging to be finger painted by a very blue, stick Evan. Got him cleaned in without any damage to the white shirt. The show begins. Dad, Amy and Evan watch the circus And I hold the wild child finally giving in and returning pacifier to mouth. Just to show who is in control, at one point Evan takes his "bop" (pacifier) out and tosses it into the audience hitting the child in front of me smack dab on the head and then it settles on the floor beneath the seats of the people in front of the people in front of me. We replace it with one of Amy’s few remaining ones and he spits it to the floor where it rolls down under the seats in front of us.

Evan wins! To the family in front of us, we had become the family behind us. He is too wacky to remain and I cannot stand to allow the poor family in front of us take anymore abuse. I sacrifice the first half of the show to let Evan walk around the stadium. Evan plays with a baby at the circus Of course, he finds a friend who’s dad happens to sell toys at the circus so they have much to do. Prior to that Evan was running me all over Thompson Bowling Arena including quickly moving up and down stairs. With no section numbers listed, it did not take long to get totally turned around. We were lost but the people in front of us weren’t getting kicked.

Eventually Evan got through his zaniness and we were able to return to enjoy the 2nd half of the show. I highly recommend it…at least the 2nd half; seems I didn’t see the first half.

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Parenting Choices Are Tough

You know.. like today.. Do I A) crush a recorder into a thousand pieces replacing the non-harmonious shrill of a plastic wanna be woodwind with the bawling tears of what could have remained a happy child OR B) turn my music up so loud, exposing the children to the poetry so lacking in their "modern music," that the shingles on the roof vibrate.

(truthfully, I enjoy hearing them play)

Narration: [audio:http://realityme.net/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/parentingchoicesaretough.mp3]

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Why do you blog?

Narration: [audio:http://realityme.net/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/whydoyoublog.mp3]

I have explained why I blog. Different people have different motivations. Some for money; some for pleasure; some to educate; some to vent; some to communicate a message; and some for friendship. Have you read about "The red-headed, left thumb blogger"? I hadn’t until Chris Brogan introduced me to her through his "Glenda Watson Hyatt Rocks" post. Glenda Watson Hyatt blogs and Twitters. Play the video to be inspired and see how this has changed her world. You can help her get paid to blog for a year by voting for her.

Glenda Watson Hyatt shares her experiences living with cerebral palsy to motivate and inspire others to think about how they perceive their own situation and their own world around them. She does all this by typing with only her left thumb! [Source, Blog for a Year]

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Joe Biden catches onto Twitter!

Presidential hopefuls should be making us their friends by talking candidly with Twitter.

joebiden Online now for a live chat via Washington Post until 5pm; submit your question: http://tinyurl.com/2ng8dj 2 minutes ago from web

joebiden Tweet a question @joebiden and a volunteer will submit it to WaPo. Include your city/state if it’s not on your profile. half a minute ago from web

Look at how close Twitter puts you to the action!

Narration with supplemental commentary: [audio:http://realityme.net/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/joebidencatchesontotwitter.mp3]>