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Happy Anniversary Cathy!

She should have run like Hell! (our story) On February 12, 2000 we had our first date. Seven years ago today, Cathy and I were married at Gatlinburg’s Ye Ol’ Tyme Photo Boothe and its been one grand adventure since then!

August 25, 2001

How will we celebrate our anniversary? It is 4am and I am frantically programming to make some goals I set for this weekend and missed. Today, in between programming, I will try to find a divorce lawyer in Knoxville who actually returns phone calls so that I can have some old history reviewed. I have to do further negotiations with the karate studio who increased my monthly bill from $175 to $190 because I asked that the billing date be moved from the 20th of the month to the 5th of the month. Cathy will spend the day texting Tommy to try to convince him that if he is not in class he still has work to do. This evening we will rush through a chicken pasta dinner of Sarah’s request which due to the finickiness of our eaters has been reduced to basically sea shell shaped noodles, bite-sized broiled chicken, and mayonnaise with my special mix of seasoning (dill, oregano, garlic powder, sometimes onion powder but rarely, parsley, salt, and celery flakes). The boys…er…boy and I will rush off to a Scout meeting while Cathy fights the other children to clean up, bathe and get to bed. She will prepare their clothing and school bags laying them out neatly by the front door. Noah and I will return home. I will kiss Cathy and tell her I love her then return to programming. She will guide Noah through his evening ritual to usher him off to bed then she will spend a bunch of time hand washing dishes since the dishwasher long ago quit doing its job. Around midnight we will both crawl into bed, make a joke about being intimate, then fall asleep. Gifts? The karate studio gets those this year. Maybe we can send the girls to Blogher.

I cannot put into words how much I love Cathy! She moves me in so many ways. She has brought so much happiness into my life!

Cathy I love you! Happy Anniversary! I look forward to many more!

  1. This post.
  2. 2007 anniversary
  3. 2006 anniversary
  4. 2005 anniversary
  5. 2004 anniversary
  6. 2003 (started blogging in ‘04)
  7. 2002 (started blogging in ‘04)
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My Sunday – a week at the University

I woke up this morning before everyone else and promptly began programming. As the morning wore on, Tommy’s departure time to return to school neared. His grandparents and Noah were to take him back to the University. Granny has not seen the campus and Noah was under the impression that it looked a lot like Hogwarts. I found a round tuit and decided to look at Tommy’s laptop which I’d been ignoring for work. LMU has 3 websites the students are required to use; a web-based email client (no pop3 or imap enabled on the exchange server which bites so I have been unable to setup GMail to check the Outlook Webmail), a blackboard (basically a portal by which professors can communicate with the students by posting assignments, slides, links, documents, etc), and a webadvisor (effectively a forum for the students to communicate as well as listings of groups, activities, etc on campus). The fourth website is a public calendar announcing events, activity schedule, and so forth. Tommy had looked at none of these. He had administrative e-mail a week old. He an assignment from a professor being ignored. And to top if off, I counted 30 hours of Internet gaming! Basically, if he wasn’t in class, he was playing games on the Internet. Two nights the gaming did not stop until 12:30am. I was beyond angry!

Now, in Tommy’s defense, this was first week of school, first week of not being under mommy and daddy’s thumb, first week of true independence. I am sure that many freshman behave this way. Also, Tommy has to figure out how to take in this new world which is overwhelming to him and a safe haven is his gaming. I simply fear Tommy falling behind and not being able to catch up.

So after a couple of hours of yelling, tears, and lectures, to which I am certain Tommy turned a deaf early early on, I installed some software to track his usage of ALL software, not just the Internet. (Thanks Tim!) I started to do some tricks to redirect certain gaming sites to education sites but really could not afford the time away from work so Tommy and I came to an agreement. At first the agreement was that the laptop would not go back to the University until he showed some seriousness about his studies; however, the laptop is a requirement of the university. We laid out some pretty clear expectations for Tommy and he is being given another chance. If he messes up, I will be severally crippling that laptop. Cathy will be spending this week on the phone with Tommy. I believe we also need to consider some serious NASA level check lists for Tommy. 1) Open eyes 2) Yawn (note: if yawn does not come from mouth, you could still be asleep, return to step 1) 3) Scratch 4) Sit up…

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How to express discontent

Our indoor cat is fairly tolerant. The litter box can be down right foul and she still uses it. Last night my pillow was marked by the cat. This morning the dog bed was marked by the cat. A pair clean pants was marked by the cat. And now, the couch marked by the cat. Perhaps she was expressing her discontent that someone had thrown trash into her litter box.

Today I learned that I can punt a 30 yard field goal and have the football land on its feet. Perhaps I was expressing my discontent over an expression of discontent.

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Don’t Do Business With Jack Butturini

Don’t do business with Jack Butturini of Martial Arts America or any other karate studio/instructor that requires you to sign a 3 year contract. Think about the length of time you are asking your child to commit to a specific interest! My 12 year old has spent nearly ¼ of his life practicing karate two and three times a week. Interests wane for children. A responsible parent should encourage the child to explore different interests, and yes, a responsible parent should encourage commitment but within reason.

My son started taking karate in the summer of 2005 (earliest post). He is burned out and hasn’t gone to a single lesson for the past 3 months. He achieved his black belt and is done. He lost his motivation before the black belt testing but showed great resolve in completing the task he had begun and I found that both honorable and mature.

Today I asked Jack Butturini to absolve me of the remaining time on our contract as I find spending $175 a month to receive no services in return a little ludicrous. His studio has moved 3 times since we started with Martial Arts America (formerly Jack Butturini Karate) each time becoming further away and more inconvenient and he is now preparing for a move to his fifth building. One of the moves was damage control to remove his name from the studio after a party at the Butturini household was busted with minors allegedly being provided alcohol by the adults (see also and commentary at Dr. Helen). While others badmouthed him, I stood up for his character and the philosophies the school taught. People were unquestionably released from contracts but we stuck with him. Today, as he laid his inability to release me from a contract on the shoulders of the owner of a billing company (SEP) which will have me dishing out another $1925 for no services rendered, I decided I could no longer give the same character reference. As such, I officially retract any supportive commentary I have given Jack Butturini and Martial Arts America.

I also admonish the karate industry itself as a thieving, conniving, bunch of unscrupulous bloodsuckers who under the guise of "character development" seek to empty your wallets in contracts and testing fees. I make that statement after talking to parents of students in a variety of karate studios around town all of which ultimately seem more interested in selling uniforms, testing fees, and locking you into a monthly fee and contract comparable to leasing a car than they are in your child’s development as a martial artist.

I think karate and the other martial arts are wonderful for children. I think it develops discipline, agility, grace, balance, and muscles. I do not think parents should be baited into a long term serious economic commitment by stringing a child along for 30, 60 or 90 days then dashing their hopes "unless mommy and daddy sign this piece of paper." If you cannot find a studio with shorter commitments such as quarterly or monthly, then give up on karate and do something longer lasting such as Boy Scouts. Now if you excuse me, I have to go close a bank account and prepare to be sued. [Update: Readers request clarification of this statement. That was snarky. Although I considered it for one angry moment, I would not close that account.]

Update: Paula is happy with Eun’s Martial Arts Center, 11110 Kingston Pke, Knoxville, TN (865) 675-2255 who offers 1 year contracts.

Update: Stormare Mackee recommends Wheeler’s Karate in Powell off of exit 112 who has 6 month contracts at roughly $80 per month.

Update: To be more clear on the figures, Noah has not attended a class for 3 months, 3 x $175 = $525, so the total I will end up paying out is $2450 to not attend his school and this is why you should never attend a single day at any studio which requires a long term contract. If you get rooked into a trial period, the child will be hurt; see paula’s comment: "…The kid was devastated…"

Update: Be sure to read Toni McSorley’s comment! Sounds like a school doing the right thing!

Update: I received an email asking if my statement that "I have to go close a bank account and prepare to be sued" meant I don’t plan on honoring my contract with Jack Butturini. To clarify, that was a snarky comment made in jest. I admit I considered it but doing so would be against my nature. I asked the billing company to move the bill date from the 20th to the 5th of the month. They increased my bill from $175 to $190(They adjusted it back down to $175), that account is open, and as long as the IRS has not seized it, they’ll get their hard earned money. There is a medical clause which applies to my son that allows exiting of the contract but based on Jack Butturini’s comments I really don’t expect him to be open to that. My motive of this post? Simply to warn other parents to be cautious of placing their young children into such lengthy contracts. Think about the last time you joined a gym and later found yourself paying monthly fees and not going. This is the same thing.

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Overthinking the problem

As a programmer, I solve problems. For my clients and myself it is important that I solve the problems as efficiently as possible with the caveat that the efficient solution must be scalable and have enough foresight as to cost effectively allow for unpredicted modifications in the future. A trap that developers fall into is overthinking the problem.

Imagine walking out of your house and realizing right as the door closed that you left your keys beside the television. Your mind races. You get all MacGyvery and start looking for a paperclip to use with your pocket knife as a makeshift lock pick. You ponder knocking out a window pane or lowering yourself down the chimney. The schemes escalate and become more elaborate. This is how a programmer overthinking the problem creates unnecessary levels of complexity which can lead to buggy code. The solution could be as simple as checking the other doors to see if one is open or getting the spare key from the neighbor. Or even more simple, doing a sanity check by confirming that the key is not in your pocket. Perhaps you didn’t even lock the door which is now the subject of your ornate plotting.

How can a programmer prevent overthinking a problem and wasting time?

  • Sleep! Sleeping on a problem gives the mind clarity. Sometimes we dream the solution and sometimes the break is enough to see the error in our ways.
  • Take a break! Similar to sleep, a diversion such as juggling, exercising, breathing fresh air, or working on a different type of problem can jolt our minds into seeing a simpler solution to the original problem. I highly recommend getting away from the computer but don’t abide by that myself. Often I will solve a sudoku puzzle or write a blog post to shock my mind into seeing a different solution.
  • Talk to peers. Other people’s input is often helpful in seeing a solution. With programming, like many aspects of life, there can be many solutions to the same problem and others can inspire us with their approach to solving the problem. If you work by yourself like I do, find peers online with IRC or Twitter.
  • Outsource. If a problem is being very difficult, give it to someone else. They may find it less complicated and it frees you to work on something different.

Using the same techniques writers use to alleviate writer’s block can cure coder’s block. Now I must return to the problem that I overcomplicated by overthinking it.