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Back in Business!

Last night while I was putting my machines back in place from our temporary exile to Holiday Inn Express (no, I don’t feel smarter), I awkwardly squeezed under my desk with my chest across the case of my primary development machine, one hand on the front corner, and one hand on the back corner when a strong tingling sensation raged through my body. I said a wordy dird. Cathy responded kindly, "Are you ok?" To which I honestly answered, "No, I’m being electrocuted." She suggested, "you should get up." I explained, "I can’t." And she left the room. Leaving me to die…die! DIE!

And yes, I found the short and have since gotten my development box and servers working. My clients will be happy to know productivity is back!

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Blogfest and Blogathon

Devil of a wife

Tonight is a Blogfest! We will be there. Rich, one of our Blogathon partners is already at Bailey’s on his shift.

Bailey’s holds a special place for Cathy and I because that was where we had our first date. We met for all of 2 minutes at a Halloween party being thrown at my house then 4 months later we were behaving like nervous school kids on a first date over a pool table at Bailey’s. I rapid fired every joke, with increasing naughtiness, I knew to cover my nervousness. Cathy flirted and wow’d me seducing me with her beauty and wit then upping the ante on my innuendos until everyone in the bar had quit playing pool to watch us being suggestive with pool cues, lessons, and across the table exposures. We had a blast! And our friends who got us together to commiserate our similar situations, hoping that we would take some frustrations out on each other and move on, just sat back and enjoyed the show as two grown adults fumbled around trying to remember how to date.

I almost blew our relationship. I was so overcome by Cathy that I really did not want to screw things up by coming on to hard. So in the parking lot I tried to be all casual and attempted to say, "I don’t want you to feel pressured or rushed into a relationship" but the words came out something like "if you want to get together and have sex without a commitment, I’m your man!" Oh yeah! Smoooooth.

Heading to Bailey’s! Oh! You can still sponsor us! Pleeaasse! Read more here.

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Egad they’re real!

Saturday night Cathy, Tommy, Evan and I decided to grab a bite to eat. And we treated ourselves to a restaurant. As we are being seated my eyes fall upon the grill that the restaurant is giving away and I drift over to it to fill out the marketing information registration as the rest of the crew move on. "It’s Doug!" I look up to see Thing 1 and Thing 2 and a nice couple, obviously their parents. Look away! Don’t make eye contact. Blast this facial/name recognition deficiency of mine. Wait. You have to look at their faces to recognize them otherwise its just bodies in clothes. Clothes! Look for clues. Well, Thing 1 and Thing 2. Pretty big clues! Tall guy. They know me. Where’s my help? Panic! Look at grill. No look for Cathy. Eh. The restaurant is a cloud of blurry people. Looks like I’m staring at the prison train from The Wall. Eeks. No help there. Clues? A theatre reference on the shirt! Thing 1, Thing 2. Suessical! It’s the Barrys!

Whew! Takes a lot of words to recall 5 seconds of one’s life. I don’t know if it is the stress of worrying that if you don’t immediately recognize someone that you will offend them or if it was all that beerdamage I did to my brain in college or if its the stress of my life in general or if I just am incapable but regardless of how well I know you there are simply times where I stare at your face and no name will come to me!

I really like seeing our online friend’s in the real world. It is nice to pretend that I have friends in the flesh for the people who read Reality Me probably know me better than people in real life and the readers probably interact with me more than people in real life. I really stay locked in the basement A LOT! We need human contact! Granted, Scouting and some of the other activities of the children have brought us out of our hermitation a bit of late. And that’s nice. Of course, I wanted to bug the Barry’s and be social but Cathy in her ever present since of prudence would not let me interrupt their dinner although I sneaked in a "good-bye" and "break a leg" despite Cathy’s protests. Barry and family, it was great seeing you guys!

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Heading to Sicko tonight!

When Tommy declared, "There should be a law that you have to speak English in America." I ranted at him for half an hour. I didn’t force my view upon him rather made an effort to open his mind to another perspective. I used examples such as "if you went to Spain, you should have to speak Spanish" and he’d retort "but I am not living there" so we went through what-if scenario after scenario and using examples such as the nice people who work at CiCi’s pizza and do not speak a word of English yet they communicate with the patrons just fine. Eventually Tommy was begging to end the conversation and I released him content that maybe he’d heard something; more than likely, he will simply think twice before raising such issues in front of me again (which would be a shame).

MM Sicko

Since Tommy will vote for our next President, and since he gets plenty of far right opinion for other relatives, I felt it prudent that he and Sarah begin their political education. How fortunate that R. Neal of Knoxviews.com offered up some tickets to Michael Moore’s Sicko! I’m sure their grandfather will deprogram them afterwards. It is not the point-of-view that I want to impress upon the children as much as I want them to appreciate that there are multiple ways to see a subject, multiple solutions to a problem, and that they should try to see everything as if they were in that other person’s shoes. See you at the movie tonight!

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Beating Around the Bush

struck by the Marker Fairystruck by the Marker Fairy

Well, I guess the title of this post is a bit more direct than my wife. See I think there has been some confusion over the Marker Fairy references. During Blogfest I tried to explain to Lissa Kay that the color of the marker holds significance. When two grown adults’ needs fall out of sync, tensions build. You know. If one adult is a morning person and the other is a night owl, it makes communication difficult.

Marker Fairy!Marker Fairy!

Cathy has simply found an interesting way to express her needs. Btw, for those of you letting your minds wander with that squiggle on my back, it is just an ice cream cone; really, it’s an ice cream cone!

I have been meaning to give that explanation since April 21! Now that’s off my chest I wonder if we can keep the green marker off my chest too!

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Seemed funny at the time

So, when you grab the camera to take a progress picture of your construction downstairs and your wife quips about taking a picture of your anatomy, don’t do it and definitely don’t make it the first picture in the camera because she might just start the pictures downloading on her computer in the kitchen and walk away to take a nap.

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Happy Birthday Evan!

Two weeks ago it was Cathy’s birthday. This past Thursday, Noah turned 11 years old. Today Evan turns two! Two very fast years. When Amy was born, I bought a book and started writing her a letter a day which became a letter a week, then none at all. When Evan was born, I bought a book and never put word one in it. Ah! Good intentions replaced by actual doings. The upcoming birthdays are Amy turning five on June 10 and Sarah turning 14 on June 24 then Tommy turns 17 on August 15.

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My Wife’s Not-so-special Birthday

Cathy and Molly

This past weekend my wife had her birthday on Saturday and Mother’s Day on Sunday. I let her down. I'm spackling, go away Cathy says this picture is how I looked all weekend; she wrongly assumed I was mad at her. Deadlines have loomed and accounts were drawn thin. In an attempt to make everything come together I tried frantically to get work done while squeezing in lawn mower repair and drywalling; if money didn’t work out, at least I could give Cathy a nice lawn and finished bedroom for her birthday. Unfortunately, nothing worked out. My grandiose plans were falling to pieces. I had failed to get the children to make gifts or collaborate on handmade cards or even buy her a present from the children (much less the same for Mother’s Day).

Fortunately, the grandparents opted to take all five children for Friday evening and most of Saturday! Cathy and I had a relaxing evening together but I did not slip away to get her a card or gift. Saturday I tried to get yard work done and the mower ran for 2 minutes before declaring it was dead dead dead. Dead lawn mowerI spackled but the joint compound I am using takes 24 hours to cure each coat and I cannot sand if Cathy and Evan will be in the bedroom within a couple of hours of sanding. the ol' pry open the door and use a coat hanger trickWe shopped but Cathy was always by my side. Finally we decided to go to the mall and I knew I could slip away but we opted to pick the children up first and I failed to find a good excuse to be away from Cathy and the children. Bad dog I tried slipping away with the children but Evan made shopping impossible. In desperation, at the end of the day, I asked Cathy if she wanted to be involved in her purchase but all I did was upset her.

For Mother’s Day, we spent the day at Cades Cove. The day was a blast despite ending with the keys being locked in the van in the middle of the wilderness and Molly eating two sets of $50 blinds.

Next holiday I’ll do better!

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Blogfest Happened!

Last night was one of those nights where I just should not have left the house. Of course, here of late as stress has increased, and I continue to work alone, I seem to have more socially inadequate moments. For me the blogfest was a blur as if I had too much to drink by the time I arrived. I got people’s names wrong, botched jokes, interrupted at inopportune times, could not get some of my past to come into clear focus, failed to eat my meal, and overall was a distraction rather than a compliment to the festivities. Oh, we also showed up late rather than early and that was me too.

I blame Evan! The child does not get restaurants although the wait staff seemed pleased that Evan was willing to sweep the floors. He tore through the restaurant as if it were a race track. Poured tea on the table. He chatted with strangers trying to enjoy their meal with the exception of the older gentleman and his daughter co-worker date escort hooker which is regretful because that could have been a fun conversation, "pardon my son for interrupting your, uh, uh, thang. So, do you measure those heals with a yard stick?" Evan was tired and doing his best to stay awake so I did the fatherly thing and drove him around until he slept but timed it wrong and he woke up just as I returned to the restaurant. Some thought I left angry but I was simply frustrated. I think Evan should have terrorized his grandparents instead of the patrons. For future blogfests, I will stay home and watch Evan, and Cathy and Tommy can go have a good time (and Tommy did have a good time! "Strawberry short cake fixes headaches and bad moods.")

On the positive side, I finally made the connection that a fellow blogger happens to be an old friend from college days! I had to sit back with a stunned look on my face as a wealth of blocked memories rushed into my head like the failure of the Wolf Creek Dam will on Nashville. Better put a call into the psychologist and hypnotist. I have lost touch with most people of my past. My best friend from high school and college days who at one time could read my mind hasn’t even met my youngest child and has only seen Amy once. Strange how age, responsibility, and children pull us into our own little cosmoses. When we went to the funeral, we boarded Molly at Dreamcatchers. I had to fill out a form that required a local emergency contact and I struggled to actually come up with a name and a phone number since all the relatives were going to Parsons.

Rich has the roundup listed as: Glenn, Helen, Tam, Friend o’ Tam (Bob I believe), Me, Cathy, Tommy, Evan, Mark, Lissa, Michael, and Rich. Cathy has the photographic evidence including the rain chains (see Jon) for Les.

Let’s do another blogfest soon!